Quintessential Perfection

The silence is telling me it is okay to relax now. It is quintessential perfection. Peace reigns in my little corner of the world. The silence tells me so.

I awoke to rain this morning. Not pounding-the-concrete rain, but gentle relaxing rain. It feels so cozy in my little space when it rains or storms. 

I realized the other day, as I lay in bed waiting for sleep, that I am more at peace when I go to bed than I ever have been. In my head I ticked off the reasons why this could be so. 

I have finally determined that it is because there is no other human being within the confines of my home. I have never slept well knowing someone else was there, whether they were asleep or awake.

When sleep doesn’t come quickly, I lie there looking at the one window in the bedroom that looks out over the patio.

With the blinds drawn, I watch the shadows of the tree branches. A breeze makes them dance, as if on a dark stage.  

I close my eyes and listen to the sound of the dogs sleeping at my feet. And I am happy. Truly happy to have them here to keep me company. We are a family of three.

This is my little world. All 700 square feet of it. It doesn’t feel confining in the least. In fact this size is absolutely perfect for me and the pupsters. If ever I build a little house, I want it to be this exact same size.

As I sit here looking out the bedroom window while I type this, I see lots of birds flit about the patio. But when I go to open the patio door, they all fly away.

I wish they’d stay and let me watch them and capture them with my camera. 

The silence has never sounded so sweet. It is the kind of silence that lays gently upon my shoulder. Like a loving hand giving me wordless comfort. 

 

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76 Comments

  1. Hi Brenda,love your blog. When you have some time could you include in your blood the name of the beautiful pottery you have displayed in a lot of your pictures.You have such a wonderful eye for style.Keep sending the beauty,it makes my day.

  2. You so eloquently articulate the immense beauty of living alone and making one's home a sacred space. Your home is your treasure and I am so happy for you. As you were watching the leaves, so was I awake during the night loving the silence of only my cat breathing and living in peace. I agree that never when I was married or in a live in relationship did I find this extraordinary beauty of silence and quiet. Now much like you I covet silence and peace. I adore the peace of my bedroom at night , having the bed for myself and my cat. Laying awake planning how to make my unique little cottage home reflect only my taste. What a gift this time of our lives is Brenda! Elizabeth Gilbert wrote "ruin is a gift, ruin is the guide to transformation." I believe that does apply to those of us that lived through the ruin, the ending, the changes and the start overs in life. Now our reward is a better understanding of who we are, what makes us happy and living with less. For me that is the immense joy of living alone with my four pawed best friend, within 4 happy walls if 300 square feet and my beloved belongings. To have the ability to make our own choices, forge our own path and develop our personal road to happiness. As women that is creating our special homes and appreciating every peaceful day. Priceless. Very well said Brenda!

  3. For me, living in a large space is unsettling. I'll take cozy over a mc mansion any day. You are living alone but not hardly really alone. For this post the number of comments is amazing. You have continual contact with people from all over. You and your little buddies are living large. Peace be with you.

  4. Lovely post, Brenda. It echoes my thoughts exactly. I've lived alone with four dogs since my divorce 17 years ago. I had one long-term relationship in that time but never considered marrying him let alone living with him. My freedom and peace were too hard won after 25 years with a borderline man. I love living aone.

  5. I am glad to hear you are at peace. I also love the way the sound of rain makes me feel all snug and cozy in my home. It sounds like you are right where you belong.

  6. Hi Brenda,
    I found you again, and subscribed to your blog! So happy to find you content and at peace. I don't mind being by myself, at all. I think probably as I am an only child. Come visit sometime, over at my blog!

  7. So happy that you are feeling content and happiness in your little cozy home. It is so true that most of us have a small area in our homes that we nest in. I think that's why I want to move to the condo that sits there empty waiting on our house to sell. I look forward to the coziness. You have come a long way, baby. Hugs

  8. I love your post today. So well said. For some, peace is never realized. You are embracing it and appreciating it because you've experienced the opposite and you know how precious peace is. To be in tune to the simplicity of life, is such a blessing. I am glad you are at this place in your life. I understand your words very well.

  9. Oh, Brenda. It brings tears to my eyes. You are at peace. . all that you have wanted you are receiving right now. How blessed you are. You and your little Pupsters are truly your family. Peace at last, I am so happy for you. Hugs, Karie

  10. I am truly glad that you have found peace and contentment.

    A comment about small spaces: when I was a working decorator, I would often go into humongous houses, and half the time, many of the "public" spaces which are mostly for show weren't even furnished. If they were, it was often sparse, and it was apparent no one ever used them. The family usually "lived" in the kitchen area, or they had a little TV room upstairs, or a den in the basement. That's where the detritus of everyday life collected, that's where the comfortable seats were, and the books and magazines. I think humans are nesters and let's be honest: a cavernous space designed for show is not a nest. I think everyone likes a cozy space, even if it is within the confines of a much larger house, because we are just wired that way.

  11. When you first moved into your new place I was worried about you. There were so many things that seemed wrong, that I didn't know how or even if you could find happiness there. I am so very glad you got all of the bugs worked out.
    I enjoy the quiet. I get up early in the morning to have my quiet time. Once my husband gets up all bets are off. He is a talker, and the TV comes on.
    This is really your first post that I know you can be content where you are. That makes me very glad for you.

  12. In quietly observing the natural elements of your surroundings: a sprinkling of rain, a whispering breeze, branches dancing to its tune, you join this quartet of 'quintessential perfection', and the harmonies are complete. Encore!!!

    xx
    Poppy

  13. It is so wonderful to hear you say these things Brenda..You have come so far..You are indeed a very wise woman for all that you have survived..The gentle rain is beautiful..it cleanses and refreshes and renews us and the sweet Earth that we live on..Let it wash away thoughts of the past and nurture the peaceful thoughts and contentment you have found..I think that loving ourselves is the most important thing we can strive for in order to find our way home..Hugs..

  14. It's good that you are comfortable being by yourself since you are a single woman then. I know so many people that aren't. I guess that's why they jump right into another relationship so soon after leaving their last one. I'm comfortable being by myself, but I prefer when my family is all home at night.

    1. If you love the simple things in life, then the big things are not what we dwell on. Waiting for the big things is missing out on so much, I've learned.

  15. Brenda, I am so glad you love your new home. I wondered how you would do. You have truly made it your home and I love all your cute things. The patio too. The way you described your house was how I used to love my house in town. It just seemed a part of me. I miss that feeling. I like this house, but I raised my daughters in the other one. :):) Blessings, xoxo,Susie

  16. … beautiful … several years ago i took a "sabbatical" from my every day life, living with sig other and two dogs (last kid off to college) and rented what i called my "little yellow house" in a nearby city, the house located within walking distance of the shores of Lake Michigan. my brother had suicided that year and there were numerous other "losses" i wished to grieve privately, rebuild, etc. so i took my doggies to this little rental space for 10 months … i dream of that time, still, and when also time "stood still" in order that i could process some things and move forward. your description here, reminds me of that house, that time … i've been back at the "big house" now with my sig other and our dogs (including adding a third) and just out of curiosity i looked up my "little yellow house" to find that it is now "beige," revamped and up for sale … funny, that.

    1. … and i meant to say, the square-footage of that house … exactly 400 delicious, well-encapsulated, cozy feet! seems to be the perfect and prime amount of property (with yard and gardens) a person needs. moving back to the "big house," i've revamped the guest room into an officeartroomsanitarium, i love to call it, and within it's walls i have all the creature comforts and things that center my soul … loved this read of yours, and the description of lying in the dark, watching the world trail and breeze by in the moonlight out the window blinds … thank you for this reminder of bliss and the importance of a women's own space in all times.

  17. I don't mind being alone. My hubby has never really understood this. I enjoy my own company; I think I am pretty darn entertaining all by myself. I spend my days with a lot of other people (135+ students this year and other teachers) so solitude is a wonderful thing. I love my job but every day is very, very busy.
    So happy you are happy!

  18. Some folks would think that not having people around you would be lonely. You have found that solitude does not have to mean lonliness. I think we all need to learn to embrace solitude.

  19. I love it that you're so happy, Brenda! I've found that I am the most content when in a small space. Our house is 900 square feet, and I feel so cozy and safe in it. This is our forever home…

  20. Your lil family of 3 deserves every moment of peace and contentment there is to be had on this plane.. I am soooooooooooo happy for all of you..

    After talking to you the other day I got out the tape measure to see just how many sq. ft are in the actual space I stay in almost 11 hours a day::: at my desk in the great room… 102 sq ft. of the great room. can you believe it? the girls all sit on the chair thats in front of my desk . Other than kitchen n potty times, here the 4 of us reside in 102 sq ft. Now if ya add the screened porch where we go of and on during each day, that takes it up to 500 sq ft lol.. Even at that we dont take up much space..
    Makes me smile to see you say you are Peaceful..

    1. You will feel that way too. In time. Isn't it amazing how we can live most of our day in a small little space? That's why I don't want much space. Just more to clean and take care of.

  21. I have learned throughout the years that the simpler my life, the happier I am. Bless you, Brenda, that you appreciate the good things around you here and now. Lots of folks don't notice things (or people) until they're gone.

    1. I guess I started noticing all the little details of daily life around 50. I'm 57 now and this has been the best decade for me. Even though it has had so much sadness. I have learned to live and love myself.

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