Love With No Place To Go

I’ve had a particularly hard couple of days. So today I have found words others have written that describes how I feel.

And I know those of you, really all of you, have grieved and thought it would surely be your steady companion. That it would never ever leave you.

grief1

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abi rose

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49 Comments

  1. Thank you for these beautiful grief quotes – really needed to read these when nothing else could capture what the painful, emotional wordless feelings I was suffering from. These helped tremendously. In loving memory of Ziggy Sequoia, my dedicated Patterdale Terrier hearing service dog who was tragically murdered by a truck driver in a white pick up truck and never got caught. I miss you Ziggy with my entire soul, body, mind and heart.

  2. Aww, Brenda, I think of your Abi every time my old girl has an accident, which is happening more frequently these days. There will come a time she will be gone and I will grieve and miss her terribly….and I shall remember these wise words you have shared with us.

  3. Brenda you have a hole in your heart. You loved Abi so much. There are so many animals out there that need your love. Abi would want that for you. Charlie is probably feeling just the same. It would help you heal. Just visit a shelter and see if a furry friend is waiting on you. Hugs

  4. Anna Quindlin’s quote is so true, it happens again every morning. Even though Henry has been gone for 2 and a half years I still think of him when I awake, it’s always with me in one form or another. It does get more bearable, but it never goes away. And truthfully, I don’t want it to.

  5. Brenda, I know you are having a very hard time. I am wondering if enough time has passed that you might consider adopting another dog? Not to replace your Abi, but to give that love a place to go. Another dog is out there needing a woman with love I to spare.

  6. Beautiful quotes Brenda. I’ll say it again “One Day at a Time”. You and Charlie are doing just fine.

    Carol and Molly

  7. Brenda…my heart is beating fast as I read the pain you are going through at this time. I pray for you…I pray for comfort and eventually an acceptance with peace. It will be a while in coming but it will. But, for today and the days coming there is a journey to wellness. A road traveled by so many who have lost their furbabies to the “Rainbow Bridge.” God made animals first in the Garden of Eden.. before He made man. .They were important to Him and He knew they would be to mankind; and they are important to us. When that little furball of love is taken we feel we will never be the same. We never are..but we can finally get to a place that we would not call them back if we could because their pain and suffering is now over and they too are at rest. I hope before long you will recall all the sweetness, love,and joy Abi brought into your life and be able to blow her memory kisses and know she is not forgotten. Not by you or your reader friends. We mourn with and for you.

  8. I saw you and Abi in the journey. I hope the fireflies have not made you cry more. Yet, for too many a day of this journey tears are all that is in us. Just “be” in your tears and grief Brenda and don’t expect more because it is a journey and a journey that was mean’t to be heartfelt.

    The day I laid my prince of a boy to rest – I only wanted to go with him while every single particle of my being screamed, “no, no, no” and “please not him”.

    I tell you true, if I thought I wanted to be in Heaven before – I absolutely must get there now and because now …He has my boys!

    Thank you, not only for a lovely blog but a wonderful place that others have been able to share with you in such meaningful, genuine manner.

    You created this, bless you.

  9. as one of the quotes… it DOES come in waves. it still comes in waves. and it’s been years. the worst with my Zeke was the memory of seeing him wag his tail even at the end! even THEN.
    yes. we’ve been through it. and we’re here with you.
    it’s not much. but it’s something. sending you love. and strength. xo

  10. I too saved these very quotes when I was drowning in grief. Some days the effort was too much and I just cried, even now almost 3 years later I find myself crying just thinking about my little Munchen. Life does move forward and there is a hole in our hearts that never heals but we move on. The love we gave and received from these sweet fur kids in stored in our hearts and minds and is like a balm on the hard days.

    A big hug to you and charlie.

    1. That’s what I feel like I’m doing. Drowning. And at times I just want to give up swimming and go on under. Because there is nowhere I can be in this life that I’m not missing her. It’s this giant wound that I know will never heal.

  11. Although we have Toby, and he is a joy to our hearts, we still miss Roxie and her loss of almost 12 years ago. There is always that little part of your heart you can’t seem to fill.
    Annie

    1. They all hold a special place in our hearts. I keep thinking the pain will fade a bit. Then it comes in huge waves all over again.

  12. It’s funny because I had just awoken from a dream before coming to read on the computer. In it my boy was alive but had been taken from me. I was using a cell phone in my dream to call authority but no matter how hard I tried it would not work for me. A friends cell was working fine but even when I tried that it would not work for me. There’s a dream I thought self explanatory. A woman wanting her dog back desperately but no matter how hard she tries it cannot be done.

    I wish I could say three months later is better but you wouldn’t want me to lie to you. I do recognize distraction can help and use it. Sometimes it even feels like an anesthetic comes over me but both conditions I recognize as something happening outside of me rather than within.

    There is another one on Pinterest that shows a dog waiting on this side of rainbow bridge. The caption underneath reads, “They will wait forever” …

    “Boy”, I thought, my boys will there in that line up! It took a whole tissue box to get through that one. For anyone who has ever loved a dog, they just know.

    There’s a writing on the Dove Lewis site some might appreciate. I like the part that says … beware it’s not without pain. Did someone forget to tell us this part? Sometimes I think anyone who has ever truly loved these creatures are braver souls than they know.

    They aren’t with us a long time but for the time that they were they sure did pack a punch.

    How incredibly special they really are.

    https://www.dovelewis.org/pet-loss-blog/advice/the-journey/2436/

  13. These touch all of us in some way. Thank you for sharing. I’ve lost too many in my life right now but my life is better for having had the love of those who have gone before me. Hugs!

    1. I think it’s finally sinking in what occurred in that last week. How I saw her fading. And that last 24 hours when I knew as the clock ticked it was getting closer to the time the vet was coming to give her that final shot. I would not let myself break down. I didn’t want her last day to be sad or afraid. But now I realize that last 24 hours was the single hardest thing I’ve ever done. And now I’m feeling every bit of what I wouldn’t allow myself to feel then.

  14. Beautiful words in this post. Take care of yourself. Give yourself and Charlie a huge hug from all of your readers.

    1. I wish Charlie would let me hug him. He just doesn’t have it in him. I am reminded of how tiny Abi was getting over that last week. I would pick her up from the vet after she’d had fluids for the day, and she was so weak I’d tuck her in next to me in the seat belt. It was like losing a little more of her every day.

  15. We all grieve with you. Some of us can totally understand what a tremendous event this has been for you as we have also had to go through it ourselves. Tears in my eyes, going through this with you and brought all the memories back of my Romeo. No other dog could ever compare to him for me.

    1. I guess we will always be reminded and grieve all over again. It may fade a bit, but I doubt it will ever go away.

    1. I am. I’m swimming in my dreams and I’m swimming when I’m awake. I don’t know if I’m swimming toward something or away from it.

    1. I’ve cried so much I don’t reach for tissue or paper towels any more. I just get a bath towel.

    1. I don’t have a printer right now. But I come back here and keep reading them because it helps a little. It helps to know that this is a pain that is universal. Not that I’d want anyone else to hurt like this. But if you love, there will come a time that you grieve. That is the cost of loving.

  16. I loved all these quotes. You have helped me so much with the loss of my beloved dog. Thank you for sharing your grief with others, and I hope it is helping you too.

    1. And thank you for sharing with me. There is no time table on grief. It is like the ocean in that it ebbs and flows. Out of nowhere I just break down and feel like I can’t possibly feel more pain. But yet I do, every single day. Like the quote said, every day you wake up and it hits you all over again.

  17. I so relate to the comment “grief is love with no place to go”. It helps to read and absorb others words when they can express it so well and I cannot. It relieves some of heaviness of the heart. Hope this day brings you some peace and comfort. Hug Charlie.

    1. I went outside to water and happened to look at the chair Abi always sat in to watch me. She rarely ever took her eyes off me. I miss her being there. I miss that impish little face. I miss my baby girl.

    1. Much of yesterday and today, I cried. I cried when I went to Sonic to get a bite to eat. I cried as I drove and had to keep wiping my eyes so I could see through the veil of tears. For some reason I just can’t seem to stop crying.

  18. So many beautiful comments and I can connect with all of them. They are all very fitting and true. Thanks for sharing. I will keep this post and return to it many times.

    1. If I read the quotes, and then these comments, over and over again, then I know I am not alone in this darkness. There is just a shadow hanging over me.

    1. I like to go to Pinterest when I’m upset but have no words. I always find words that console me there.