Monday Kitten Update

Well, for today’s kitten update little Gracie Mae is making a little progress. (Mae is my middle name).

Apparently she was the quiet one in the group before she came here, so she’s just a timid little girl I guess.

I wish I had photos of her, but I’ve only seen her off and on briefly myself as she darts from one place to another.

She was starting to come out and wander a bit last night, but then Ivy decided to get hissy and scared her off.

Ivy is acting different than she normally is. She’s changed up her habits. I guess it’s the adjustment.

This morning I could not resist and picked Gracie up from where she was in between two things in the closet. That was probably a mistake, rushing her. But she was meowing and I thought maybe I could comfort her. I wanted to hold her so bad!

So I petted her and talked to her and put her nose up to mine. But she wasn’t having any of it and off she went again.

Sometimes I get down on the floor with her toys and try to cajole her out. Nope, isn’t working.

I’ve been Googling and reading what others advise about this situation. I was comforted by the fact that one guy wrote: “I’ve had 17 kitties and not one of them lived under the bed.” So that was encouraging.

I ordered one of those toys with a stick and jingly feathery things at the end of the dangling line. But it was Ivy that went bonkers for it.

A bit later I found Ivy in the bathtub with that toy. She had the stick part dangling over the edge of the tub like a fishing pole and was playing with the toy part. Ivy loves the bath tub.

I don’t think Gracie has eaten or anything, though I can’t be certain. So I keep moving her bowls closer to her hiding hangouts.

I ordered both Ivy and Gracie identical beds. So far they haven’t been used.

This morning I brought her litter box out of the closet and put it along the wall where she tends to stay behind the couch. She hadn’t used it and I wasn’t sure she knew where it was.

I just saw her wander into the hall. Now if Ivy won’t hiss at her maybe she’ll feel more comfortable and check the apartment out bit by bit.

I know she was wandering during the night because at one point I heard something fall.

This morning I found the table lamp in my chair. I bet it scared Gracie silly when she knocked that thing over.


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  1. Brenda
    Gracie is so sweet. White with the bluest eyes. Ivy will play with her and teach her things. So much fun to watch. Did you put something under your toaster oven to keep your counter from being burned? I’m unsure what to use. I am getting a new toaster oven and it might be just like yours. Thank you for help if you can. 😊

  2. Brenda; Your new little girl is beyond precious. I am very glad that you made the decision to have another kitty in your household. One teeny bit of advice is about her name. My experience with the name Gracie is of old ladies – so I suggest a more youthful name such as Holly. Just give her a little time to settle into her new home, she is one very lucky kitty.

  3. Brenda; Your new little girl is beyond precious. I am very glad that you made the decision to have another kitty in your household. One teeny bit of advice is about her name. My experience with the name Gracie is of old ladies – so I suggest a more youthful name such as Holly. Just give her a little time to settle into her new home, she is one very lucky kitty.

  4. love the name Gracie Mae and the neighbor’s dog lives here, her name is Daisy Mae (although no one calls her Mae except me). I have 16 cats and one is a 4 or 5 week old kitten named Tuppence. She’s Siamese looking, found wandering on the road the animal control gave her to me to tend. She’s fed about every 3 hours, sleeps in a cat carrier sitting atop a heating pad on low. During the day she’s either climbing on me or asleep in the large dog crate.
    Gracie Mae is eating but depending upon her age, not very much. If she’s very young, you might moisten her kitten kibble with kitten milk to give her an extra boost.

  5. Wow. I’m so glad I am not the only one having kitten issues. About two and a half months ago a stray cat came to our house. Just as we were adjusting to her she returned with four babies. They are living in our garage. We are trying to find homes for two of them, hopefully as a pair. We are going to keep two babies and the mama cat. We have had the most fun with them. We also have an inside kitty and two dogs so we really have our hands full. It has taken a lot of work to be able to pick the kittens up. We still don’t pick mama cat up but she will allow us to pet her. The kittens are a little friendlier but still need work. It’s definitely a process. Good luck with your new baby.

  6. Try and keep her in a small contained area. Gradually increase her area until she gets used to you, her home and Ivy. You may think you have a small apartment, but to Gracie, it’s huge and scary.

  7. One of my cats liked each other after a week. My last siamese hated the 2 others for a solid 4 months. What helped was Feliway diffusers in each room. It’s a plug in that releases a scent that relaxes cats. I also defined their their territory by not putting litter box/food anywhere close to each other. Cats get to know each other by scent. Take a sock and rub it on ivy and you and leave on floor for her to sniff. Try to do same with new kitty to leave for ivy. Just hearing your voice will relax her. Mine always came out at night. Just going to take time.

  8. What everyone has said about PATIENCE is absolutely correct! And no ~ you didn’t harm her by picking her up ~

  9. I love her name! Gracie Mae will soon realize just how wonderful she has it, to have landed in a loving home! I guess when she’s really hungry, she’ll come out.

  10. Hi Brenda,
    Gracie Mae (love the name) will be fine and so will Ivy. Gracie Mae may be hiding, but she’s watching you and Ivy. She’s in a safe, quiet environment and she will realize that soon. It’s only been a few days. She will adjust. She will eat when she’s hungry and use the box when no one is looking. I recently took in an abandoned, very young, male cat and had to integrate Simon with my 18+ year old Bichon Lily. Talk about a challenge. It took about a month, but it’s all worked out. Ivy may have her nose out of joint, but that will pass too. Ivy knows you love her, she’s just giving you the stink eye at the moment because there’s been a change in her world, because she’s a cat and because she can. Remember, Ivy changed her habits for a bit when sweet Charlie disappeared from her world. She got over it. It just took time. Now there’s a new presence and she will adjust again.
    As everyone else has mentioned, don’t feel bad, have patience and my motto is “this too shall pass”. Margie in CA

  11. Patience is the name of the game. Sounds like each day she is getting a little braver and braver. Eventually she will come out and eat and be more social. She just needs a little more time. Love her name.

  12. At this point Brenda just let the kitten be. As long as there is food, water and a litterbox, she will find them. You picking her up did not harm her.
    She is taking her time with all the newness in her own way. All will be well! Relax and just be patient. Soon enough Gracie and Ivy will be BFF’s, and you will be snuggling with that sweet kitten. Hugs! Gail

  13. Gracie Mae will join you and Ivy real soon! She just needs a little time to adjust to her new surroundings! She probably is missing her brother, but she will be very happy living with you and Ivy in a very loving home!

  14. Dont worry Brenda Gracie will be fine. I raised persians for many years and have had many rescues. Gracie will not starve herself. All will be great next week at this time. Dont cry you picking her up did not set her back. She will be back for more loving soon. Just relax and enjoy. Cats fo everything on their time.
    Enjoy your week.

  15. Brenda, please don’t be so worried. Cats just take their own time to adjust to any kind of change. My two spent the better part of a week holed up in my bedroom while I was out of town for a week. The sitter who’s taken care of them several times just put their food in the bedroom so they were able to stay where they were comfortable to eat their canned food but she could tell that they sneaked out when she was away or sleeping to use the litter box and eat dry food back in the laundry room. Also, when I buy them new beds they don’t sleep in them until they’re good and ready but they always get around to it in their own sweet time. Remember how long it took Ivy to decide she liked her cat tree? I think the best thing you can do is just go about your normal activities and let Gracie learn that your home is a place of comfort and peace and don’t worry about Ivy either. She just needs some time to accept that her life won’t be changing and she’ll be her old self again. Cats are just nothing like dogs, are they?

  16. Is there a way you can just spend a little time with Gracie by herself? Is there a room with a door you can close and put her litter pan, water, food in there just until she’s comfortable?
    I used to have a second bedroom where I could spend time whenever a new kitty came to live with me. I would set her in her litter pan so that she was aware that it was there, even if she doesn’t need it at the time. I’d put her food dish and water dish in there too. I used to lay on the floor and wait for the new kitty to come to me, and I would just love her. With Gracie, I would slowly introduce her to Ivy and make sure you’re loving on Ivy too. If she was used to being around her brother she may just be grieving him. Think about it. That would be hard enough on a human, but with an animal, they can’t talk to us about how they are feeling. I’ll be praying for all of you.

    1. I’ve got all that in the bedroom right now. Wherever she is in there. But eventually Ivy will need to go use her litter box. And I’m afraid to move it and freak Ivy out even more.

  17. Gracie is going to be fine. We got a kitten last year and she had a 12 year old male cat and a 14 year old dog to contend with. I worried about her not eating and not using the litter box but in time all those worries were for naught. The older cat hissed at her and still does on occasion but she decided he was a good plaything and wouldn’t give up on him. She really is going to be fine as is Ivy. Just give it a few days, Gracie won’t starve and she will use the litter box. Ivy will resume her routine and be curious about her new sister. Pretend you are a cat and ignore them for now 😊

      1. Dear Brenda – don’t feel badly – you just so wanted to give her some love. She will come around. All kitties are so different – Ivy was really remarkable in how she immediately settled into your home when she arrived. This little girl probably does miss her brother. It will be ok – we are all thinking of you and rooting for you all. It’s a change for all of you. Don’t cry – all will be well.

  18. There’s a TNR group in Flatbush NY (Flatbush Cats) that I follow and donate to and they have some excellent videos on their Youtube channel about helping fur babies adjust. I’ve used some of the puree that comes in foil tubes to help my cats get accustomed to being with each other. It’s a slow process, but they ALL love the puree and will get in my lap for their share. They’ll actually sit in a circle as I go round robin and they each get a little from the tube. I try not to give them a lot, as I’m afraid it may be too rich, but it’s a special treat they love.
    Best of luck with developing their relationship! Worth it.

  19. When I bring a new pet home, I try to keep them separate for about 48hrs to get used to each others scent. However, with your apartment setup I don’t think you have a separate room to put Gracie with a litterbox and food and water, unless you put her in the bathroom and keep the door closed to keep Ivy out. Then you could go in at intervals so Gracie gets used to you and as she becomes more secure, she will be ready to venture out some. I have used an empty cardboard box lined with aluminum foil for a temporary litterbox. If you can separate them for a bit, you can monitor Gracie for eating and using the litter box. A small space will help her relax and feel safe. Might be worth a try.

    1. She’s in deep hiding again. So I guess picking her up set her back. She’s no longer meowing or darting around. Can’t even locate her. The problem is Ivy’s litter box is in the bedroom. I don’t even think my bathroom door will shut all the way.

  20. Brenda you may want to look at Jackson Galaxy, he is a cat behaviorist. You can watch him on youtube.
    I am a worrywort but I would be concerned if the new kitty had not eaten anything.
    If she stays under the sofa I would put her food under there and gradually move it out in the next few days.

  21. I once read that kitties love butter and so to put a dab of butter on their nose and they feel comfort as they lick it off. It was suggested for outdoor cats that wander away from home and “forget’ to come back. Worked for us. When we have moved with our kitties to a different home I always dab a bit of butter on their nose in their new place and they have done fine. Maybe Gracie Mae would like a bit of butter …

  22. I had to laugh about the tub. Sophie gets in the master tub every morning to play with the spider plant while I get ready. She knows when I’m done, she gets an after breakfast treat. The master tub is a garden tub that I can no longer easily get in and out of anymore. I use the shower instead.

    Hang in there, the cats will adjust on their own time. Sam and Millie took a while as I recall. Both are gone now and Sophie is a rescue cat that was about 10 when she came to live with me


  23. Cats with blue eyes are special .I found one just like yours in my backyard ,it was about 1978 . posted add for him no one answered .They are beautiful cats Flame Points. It takes time for them to love each other . Now time to think of a CATIO !

  24. Cats are nothing like dogs. They like being alone and don’t need a friend. We had 3 at one time. Had the one for several years, then got a kitten. Older one just ignored her. Shortly we went and got her brother from that litter and all were happy. The brother and sister played together and the older one was happy

    1. I’ve loved reading all your comments…so many kind people who’ve opened their compassionate hearts to rescue, and are here now in this sisterhood of caring! I can’t add anything to what they’ve said… did NOT harm Gracie by picking her up, she will NOT starve, Ivy may have her nose out of joint now, but she’ll come around and the two will be besties! Mark your calendar for October 27, 2021 and come back here to tell us how needless your worries were a month ago!
      Our Mickey (feral kitten rescued from slipping down a bank into the river and nearly drowning) is now a healthy, happy 15 year old. We acquired him in mid-August. Our Christmas gift was him hopping on the bed that morning and settling in, purring away! So, it takes awhile sometimes, but they eventually realize they’re safe and comfortable and home to stay!

  25. Not sure if you should have their beds close to each other. Ivy may feel that her territory is being invaded by the newcomer, especially when she sees you petting Gracie and trying to engage with her. Not sure – but perhaps if you play a lot with Ivy like you normally do – playing fetch with her toys and petting her when she wants it, to assure her in whatever ways you can that she is still the Queen of the Castle, the kitty may be watching or listening and may start to feel more relaxed in her environment. Ideally the time will come when they will be at your sides on the sofa, one on the left and one on the right, getting petted and rubbed while purring away.

    1. Ivy isn’t even wanting to play fetch now. She’s changed her routine. Isn’t eating much either. Now I’m worried about both of them. No worries on the beds. Neither one has gone near them. Just put them together to take a photo.

  26. Patience Patience Patience. That’s what it takes to introduce new pets to others and a new environment to them, I always say us old folks have all the time in the world to let a new pet adapt to us. We are the ones not running out doing a ton of stuff to leave them so they get use to our habits and noise while we shuffle around. Your updates make me smile knowing she has a new home,

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