I look out the French doors and see that the two container trees are nearly bare. Only the Japanese Maple still has a few brown crinkled leaves left, For some reason fiercely holding on.
Vestiges of the past season still clings to the season before us.
It’s a bit sad to look out and remember what it looked like during the summer when all the flowers were blooming. When the vegetables were growing so rapidly I could hardly keep up with eating them.
What a miracle the seasons are.
My patio garden is so important to me. To my physical and mental health.
Just sitting here looking out at the patio, I think back to the 7 summers lived here. Can you believe it? I’ve lived here nearly 8 years now. How time passes.
In that time, I lost my sweet Abi, who I miss and mourn every day.
And then Ivy came to live with us, bringing to this home such love and joy and fun.
Charlie, at 14, is still with me. But his health is declining. So I try to just enjoy every moment with him. He has been with me through thick and thin.
A Sad Time:
The world is a sad place right now. Well over 300,000 Americans will not be sitting at the Christmas table to dine with family. There will be empty chairs in so many homes.
And there is so much more happening. Lost jobs. Lost homes. Those on the verge of losing both. Such sadness during a time when we normally pause to celebrate.
But life goes on. We all will go on. With bittersweet longing, we will keep moving forward.
We will plant our spring gardens, just as we do every year. Revel in the spring bulbs that put on their colorful show for us. Then as they say goodbye, here come the perennials that have been sleeping beneath the ground as well. Awaiting their turn.
Our gardens will prove to us that time marches forward, no matter what else may be happening. The seasons will come and then fade as always.
That empty seat at so many tables will be a reminder that with love comes loss.
But we will move on. We don’t get a choice, because time marches forward.
Taking us with it.
Fur babies are the best. We’ve been talking about adopting a fur baby recently. At this stage of the game we need a smallish dog as it’s too hard to lift the larger one’s. Actually, it’s sort of funny… my husband has been more into getting a dog that I have and last night I had a dream that our old vet had 4 mini schnauzers that were up for adoption, So, maybe I’m more ready to add a dog than I thought. A new pet certainly would take some attention off the situation the world is in right now.
Hi I just wanted to stop by to say hello and tell you how much I enjoy reading your blog. I suffered with you when you lost your baby dog and knew that pain myself. Your blog is down to earth and you share with us your daily thoughts. I have your blog on my blog list and visit frequently. Thank you for sharing your life with us. I hope you have a happy holiday and a safe and healthy new year. Peggy
I just love the warm months .Winter is hard on my old Bones ,but we start gaining a minute each day and every passing day is a day closer to my Beloved Spring .I just tell myself I think can ,I think I can. And before you know it it is Spring.2020 is a year NO ONE SAW COMING. I am so ready for it to be gone. I pray 2021 will be much better and I sure am sorry for all who have lost family members to Covid19. No stopping the changing of Seasons ,I guess it really does make us appreciate them all so much more anyway.
My opinion is that the powers-that-be…whomever they are…have wanted us to suffer and suffer a lot this year. But there is one thing they must not have considered…most of us ordinary people have all been in a much similar place…esp. those of us retired folks…who are the main ones NOT TO BE SEEN or visited by our kin and others. There are ways, thanks to the good part of the internet, to keep in touch…and maybe some are even trying more to stay in touch than they were. We feel lonely…but hubby and I are together too…we think it is harder to be single and alone. I am glad you have continued to see your daughters, Brenda. Mine can only see us over the apt patio fence from time to time…even that risks incuring the wrath of the rulers in our state. And due to her EX who will cause trouble at the drop of a pin, she must walk the narrow path. But we see other good things this year too, in spite of it all: our grandkids here who had to attend regular school have THRIVED being schooled at home via online class while their mom works from home. It is not easy nor perfect but I expect the kids will look back with longing on this time, once life returns to normal. In fact, the son, really does not want to return to regular classroom…he has had a LOT more playtime with neighbor kids and a couple friends who bike over to play at the house…less classroom time allows for that. I think the learning has actually increased, in areas often not really helped by huge classrooms of kids. Plus being mom is there if needed, has been good for the kids. The lack of good practice in the local stores has helped me increase my shopping online too. Also, not a bad thing as we age and will need to use it more anyway. I am concerned for those without work and loosing businesses…that does not bode well for the future either…but if each of us does whatever we can to help…surely that will pay off too. I remember a lot that was learned by those who lived through the Great Depression and the World Wars time. And one can learn a lot online, if one’s kin did not share that with them. As in all parts of life, it helps us, if we can find ways to cope, in spite of the bad things done to us. 2019 was a very hard year for us and I so longed for 2020…which was different but not better. But still some hope lingers that 2021 will bring us unexpected goodness and joy. Be good to each other (what my beloved Grandma always said to us).
What is the line from the poem “Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” Older civilizations than ours recognized that the revolving wheel of the seasons year after year reflected what our own life cycle is, and that of all living beings. Suffering loss of a loved one is devastating, but we often discover we are more resilient than we ever thought we could be, and we do move on, often wiser and more compassionate because of that experience.
Your post and your reader’s comments have struck a cord with me. I have been feeling more anxious and sad in the last few days. I am trying to limit watching the news and watching more Christmas movies. It seems like winter snuck up on us in the last 2 weeks. We were lucky to miss the snow that clobbered the North East. I did a double take yesterday when I spotted the daffodil leaves pushing an inch up thru the ground! Stay safe and have a nice weekend!
Wonderful post, Brenda! Thank you.
Recently I’ve spent so much time reflecting about my life and life in general. I do everything I can to simply enjoy my day with silly Christmas movies, my needlework and my sweet Cooper. If I’m not careful and stay focused I could easily spin out of control with anxiety but what good would that do?
Time is marching on and we can only do what we can do. Those that have the power to help those that desperately need help are too busy with their egos to think far beyond said egos.
Yes, time marches on!!!
Hi Darlene & Cooper,
Funny I’ve been watching Christmas movies and enjoying life with our new puppy named “Cooper” too. He’s brought much joy after losing our doggie “Precious” 2 years ago and our cat “Ebony” of 20 years in May. I was very sad and didn’t realize it. Cooper has brought happiness to me this year when it was desperately needed.
Thank you so much Brenda for this post. We will get through this time. This too shall pass.
I love this time of year, when the flat gray of the sky allows the bare tree branches to show up so well. I was putting the kitchen veggie scraps into the compost spot in my yard this morning when I started noticing how much green there still is in the midst of the muted landscape. It was around 27 degrees at the time, and I saw so many perennial plants with green leaves, and of course the big fat taxus bushes by the front door are their constant dark green. The Bradford pear finally has lost its leaves, but it has a few shoots at the base that have leaves about the size of a nickel in green, red and yellow. These little signs of warmer times never quite go away, and add a bit of cheer.
Brenda, it is a very sad Christmas indeed. It doesn’t really feel like Christmas this year and for so many who have no jobs, no homes and missing members of their family is probably feels like the worst Christmas ever. Add our politicians that seem to be doing NOTHING to help these people or all of the business that are suffering and it is a very s—– time. I pray that those who have lost family members find some peace, that those who have lost jobs, homes and businesses are given the help they need.
Enoy your day! and your sweet pets.
It is hard for me not to see my flowers blooming and how relaxing it was to water my plants everyday and tend to them. A lot of people feel that was a chore to water and tend to plants and flowers in the garden but it was relaxing and enjoyable for me. I will miss those wonderful Spring and Summer days until we have them again. The months of January through May are hard here in Illinois. Hoping for sunshine during those long cold winter days. Have a good weekend.
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