I just found out about the horrible loss of a blogger in Michigan.

She and her son lost their lives because she had filed for divorce.

Her husband shot and killed them before fatally shooting himself in a murder-suicide.

The loss of a blogger Christine Keith

Her Blog:

Christine Keith, 37, filed for divorce in October from her husband, 53-year-old Randy Keith. He had allegedly threatened to kill her numerous times.

Christine, the writer of “Adventures of a Thrifty Mama,” previously filed for divorce in May but dropped the proceedings.

This is oftentimes when men kill their wives in order to stop the divorce.

Her blog was about working to feed her family on a tight budget using only fresh, homemade ingredients.


Did you know there is a Wikipedia page on this very subject? Killing multiple members of your family in quick succession and then yourself is called Familicide.

I have tried to write about things of this nature in the past, but people are always uncomfortable with it. Readers don’t know what to say, how to comment. I understand that.

Unless they’ve been there or someone they know has been there. And in that case, they usually email me to protect their anonymity.

Unfortunately there is still a stigma attached when it comes to domestic violence.  

Domestic Violence Awareness Month:

October was Domestic Violence Awareness month.

Please keep Christine and her son in your thoughts. Along with the four younger children who are now orphaned.

As well as writing her blog, Christine was heavily involved in her community teaching Zumba classes.

Now her younger children will live with this tragedy for the rest of their lives.

Let’s help to erase the stigma so that these women will feel they have us on their side. Because they so badly need us to be there for them.

We women need to stick together and help one another.

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  1. I just read this – it is so incredibly sad. I think you should be able to write what you want on your blog. Life is about the good and the bad. I have a cousin who was in a bad domestic situation and we didn't even know until she got out and divorced. She was embarrassed to confide – and the fact of the matter is we all would have gone and gotten her and set him straight. He was a bully. Her daughter is grown and so glad she got out before something like this happened! It can happen to anyone b/c they pretend to be good people until after they are married. GOOD FOR YOU for posting about a fellow blogger Brenda!

  2. Brenda, I just saw this post of yours…and have to say kudos to you for posting it! I am a survivor of Domestic Violence and have a story to tell…and I'm glad I'm here to tell it. My post tomorrow will contain info about Christine, myself and another friend of mine…along with Domestic Violence in general. Thanks for posting this – it motivated me to run with it on my blog, too. I'm adding a button on my Blog entitled Domestic Violence and will be adding posts and info to it as time goes by. Jan ♥

  3. Hi Brenda….
    I've read and reread this post several times……my first comment was going to be out of such sadness, then I walked away to rethink it….then I was so angry my fingers hurt from striking the keys so hard….now this comment needs to express all that….never quiet your voice, it needs to be heard, those who choose not to listen because its not pretty and all lite up with daisy's and butterfly's have never known someone who has lived through this. I had a friend who did. I was with her when he attacked….when she finally got mad enough and realized this hell was never going to end until he killed her and her children she found the strength within. The last time he showed up at her door he was met with a shotgun……needless to say, he moved on…..some people will think that is not how to handle this kind of situation….until you've been witness to that kind of insanity…..you'll never know what your capable of doing to protect yourself and your children….My friend has emerged stronger and a whole lot smarter but damaged nonetheless…..and she has to live with knowing he is still out there…I ran into him a few years ago, he tried to turn his anger on me, I laughed in his face and told him to always look up, never know when someone will drop a house on him!
    The best advice I can give to young women is that leopards don't change their spots…..and yes I know there is always an exception to every rule but a normal, loving, kind man doesn't usually wake up one morning, make coffee, put the kids on the school bus and beat his wife unconscious……People will tell me how lucky I am to have such a wonderful husband and a forty year marriage….luck has nothing to do with it…..respect for each other is the base of a good marriage and when that disappears and can't or won't come back its time to leave….
    Stay true to yourself Brenda and keep your voice loud and clear so Christine's light never goes out….


    1. I also was having a very difficult time responding to this post. Both my children and myself were victims of domestic violence and lived to tell about it. PLEASE continue to speak what is laid on your heart. Domestic violence is very prevalent and directed towards both women, men and children. Others speaking out may be what saves the next Mother and child! From what I can see blogging is sharing what is going on in your life and those around. SHINE your light!! Thank you!

  4. Dear Brenda, you have a voice and you should let it be heard. This is your blog and you can write about anything you like. You've always had a passion for helping women in domestic abuse so why should you be quiet? Who cares what anyone else thinks? It is awful that Christine and her son had to lose their lives because of someone else's inability to deal with life circumstances. Very sad for the families. God rest their souls. Blessings to you! And don't even bother yourself worrying about what anyone else thinks. Hugs, Tammy

  5. I have just read this post, and I would encourage you to write as you are lead. You might never know who in your readership needs to hear what you what to sash, and you may never hear from them. I rarely ever comment, but wanted to say I only follow three. Blogs by email. Yours being one of them. I like your writing style and your courage to address the difficult issues of life.

  6. This is tragic and I had no idea this had happened. I had read Christine's blog in the not so recent past (in the autumn). Domestic abuse is a horror and this is the tragic results. So sorry to hear of this…

  7. What a horrible tragedy. We should all be aware things like this do happen. Don't stop writing about what you think you should. If people don't agree they just don't need to read it. Such a sad thing for this family and why would you kill your own child? I always wonder why this kind of person just doesn't kill their self and leave the others alone. So scary to think there are people like this in the world.

  8. I've always admired that you write about what's important to you, Brenda, regardless of criticism. Freedom of speech is one of our most precious rights, and I applaud you for exercising your right in the face of opposition.

  9. I am sad to read of this tragedy. I am also sad to know that people try to tell you what not to write on you blog. I don't like the content of every blog post that I read, so I just move on.

  10. I have lost friends to domestic violence and it NEEDS to be talked about more than it is. You are right, we tend to shy away from topics that make us uncomfortable. And sometimes even though we "kinda" know someone that is going through it, we seem to look the other way, until it is too late. The statistics for a person "breaking" away from the situation and actually being able to make it without further confrontations are very low. And sadly those confrontations usually end in a lost life. Thank you for sharing this story and encouraging everyone to be more open with it.

  11. Brenda, I appreciate the realness of your blog in a time when blogs are more and more "perfect" and commercial, all about the sponsors and ad revenue. I have stopped reading many because they never talk about their lives anymore, just post giveaway after giveaway. Life is not always pretty and this is an important subject. People who just want pretty photos have thousands of other corporate shills from which to obtain them. I appreciate your voice.

  12. Dear Brenda,

    I am just now catching up on your posts — please do not listen to anyone dissing your blog posts. Keep on being yourself, your words always ring true and I know touch many readers of your blog. If people do not like what they read, well, they can just 'click' out of it and stop reading.
    I truly enjoy your honesty and heartfelt blogs – they are the reason that Cozy Little House is the blog I like best!
    I appreciate your caring heart…just be you and be true!

  13. Life can be complicated, unfair and sad. This is your blog and as long as it follows decency guidelines, you are free to post as you please. If this post makes one woman realize her precarious situation, it has served its purpose.

  14. I am saddened to hear of this tragedy. Thank you for writing about Christine and her son. I have tried to help women who have had to leave their homes. I have donated goods and monies for their new homes. But now I feel I need to do more than give material things. We need to work to protect them, but how? Stay real and true to yourself.

  15. Brenda, my heart is beyond breaking for this mom and son…and please write about whatever prompts you at the moment…if someone doesn't want to read a post or your blog, then that is up to them…otherwise it deprives the rest of us of your wisdom and beautiful writings! My prayers are going to this mom, son and her family at their time of such a sad loss:(

  16. Brenda,
    Please don't listen to your critics. The reason I read your blog is because you are honest and real! Even though we should be grateful for life, its tough sometimes. I refuse to read blogs that are phony and don't deal with the nitty-gritty that most of us deal with on a day to day basis.
    I am so sad for this woman and her family. I have been there and it is a very scary place. It's ridiculous to think that she got herself in to that situation. It makes me very angry that people think that it could never happen to them. It can happen to anyone.
    Again, thank you for speaking the truth.
    Clara from Redeemed Junk and Stuff

  17. I hadn't heard the news of this poor woman and her son. I don't know what to say that hasn't been said already, but I totally support you in writing whatever is on your heart! Obviously life isn't just about pretty pictures. I appreciate your willingness to talk about the hard stuff. You never know who you might save, just by them knowing there is a caring community here.
    Blessings to you, Brenda!

  18. Brenda, Nine years ago my Mother in law and sister in law were murdered by my sister in law's ex husband. He rammed his truck into their house after midnight one night and when they ran out disoriented, he ran them over mercilessly, Neighbors and witnesses were watching in horror and pleading with him to stop. When firemen and ambulances arrived, he held them off with a gun so they could not administer aid to our loved ones. It was horrible. He spent a year in a mental institution before a judge decided he was stable enought to stand trial. His children by a previous marriage wanted him declared mentally insane so their mother would not lose her benefits. (She drew on his social security.) He was finally sentenced to life in prison. It was just so cold hearted and needless. There are some people who are hell bent to kill someone and I don't think there is much anyone can do, Life is short and there are unpleasant things that happen. If people don't want to read about it, THEY DON'T HAVE TO. Don't let people intimidate you Brenda. Write what you want.

  19. I only recently started following your blog. You had me as soon as I saw a photo of your vegetable canisters as I have the same set plus a kitchen decorated in red. Despite my fairly new introduction to your blog, yours is now the first I open every day specifically because of your writing style. The depth of your personality, soul and talent is put forth ever so eloquently in your writings, I "feel" what you have to say. Your blog goes beyond pretty. That being said, I have a good friend who's daughter was involved in a violent marriage. Drugs, beatings, stalking, and restraining orders not worth the paper they were printed on were her life. Jail time was never a deterrent. Once released, he found and beat her yet again. She was sure he was going to kill her one day. He didn't, instead moved on to another woman who suffered the same treatment. Telling a victim that she can just leave is a worthless piece of advice on the same level as telling a parent who has lost a child that they can always have another, or a person suffering from depression to pull them up by their bootstraps. Just go on being "Brenda", writing how you write about subjects important to you. Know for certain that you are admired by many.

  20. Dear Brenda,

    The things you write are important and there are many who need to read your words, to know they are not alone. Continue with your calling. You are doing it well. What you have to say may not be everyone's "cup of tea," but there are many other venues they can seek.

    You are the very best version of you. No one else can do it!

    God bless and keep you!

  21. Dear Brenda
    I agree totally with many of the comments here regarding the audacity of some of your readers. I really do not understand how anyone can demand that you write your posts in a certain way. As far as I understand blogging is all about expressing yourself not someone elses ideas or preferences. My message to those people would be if you don't like reading Brenda's posts don't waste your time visiting this blog or your breath criticizing the contents. As for domestic violence a sore subject. I have a friend …….which I will not and cannot discuss here as being my friend I do not have her permission to do so. I hate to hear about Christine and her son…that is so tragic! I can also say yes I am at lost for words but it isn't because I don't care but more due to ignorance. What can be done to stop this?

    keep well

    Amanda xx

  22. I recently read about this particular blogger and her son. My heart breaks…
    My sister was murdered by her husband in 2010. The world darkened & diminished. I wish
    we would have known that when a woman decides to leave, this is the most DANGEROUS time.
    Her murderer shot her as she was walking out the door.
    Silence.. Kills. Kills. Kills.
    Thank you for using your Voice and this Platform to tell this woman's story.

    My Inner Chick

  23. Thank you for sharing the "hard stuff" with us. I will keep Christine and her son in my prayers. No woman or child deserves that horrible fate.

    I've been a follower of yours from just about the beginning and you do touch in all aspects if life. In many aspects we have so much in common…our divorces and the circumstances both before and after, illnesses/injuries, moving to smaller homes, dealing with life changing events, and I know that there are many bleary bleak days mixed with laughter and fun and joy!

    Keep telling like it is Sister!

  24. What Chris K said-I read your blog because of the reality and real life subjects you write about-there are plenty of fluff-only blogs out there if that's all a reader wants. You are a real writer! Please keep it up.

  25. Keep on, Brenda. Rather than a post about decorating 17 trees in your house, all in white, with only teal accents….this is something that actually matters. And it matters to all of us. From the comments you have received so far, you can see how many people this awful subject touches in some way. This season also brings much sadness and unhappiness to many. Baking 12 different kinds of cookies and decorating every nook and cranny will not make it go away. So, keep on, Brenda. This is real life. This matters.

  26. So glad you are allowing us to share our condolences on the loss of this beautiful woman and her son. I looked at her blog and saw that she was a mother of 4. 3 children orphaned. Truly heart wrenching. I think stories like this need to be published to make us all aware that domestic abuse is still prevalent in our society, despite all the education.

    This past May, about 15 police cars screamed by my house on our quiet dead end country road. The next morning we learned that our neighbour had been shot and killed by her husband whom she was divorcing. Their one daughter was at her prom when she was called home. It was so tragic. The greater tragedy is just forgetting about these women.

    Thank you for enabling the comments.

  27. I am simply left speechless by the horror of this heinous crime. My thanks to those who have so eloquently explained the tears that I am shedding…

    Please continue to write from the heart, Brenda. Or we will all lose a piece of your beautiful heart. Such a tragic loss that would be.

    Today, you are my hero…

  28. Sad, sad, sad……..This happened recently in my own little town.
    I enjoy your posts because you are real. You have a great variety here on your posts, decorating, awesome story telling, pooches, and inspiring ideas. Keep being real!!!

  29. Brenda, there is a heaviness of the heart in reading about this woman and her son, a tragic needless loss. Just as we all were shocked last year near this time at the senseless murder of innocent children in Connecticut. Blogging is about life, and death and everything that happens in-between. While what we blog about may not please everyone, we have to be true to ourselves, don't we? I would personally not visit a blog that was completely about sad things because I have to keep my spirits up, but when a blogger has something sad to write about we send our sympathy to her just as much as we send congratulations when she, or he, has good news to share with us.

    I know you must feel about this young woman, "There but for the grace of God, go I and many other women." We have to remember that. It might help us to help a daughter or a granddaughter not be in that position some day.

  30. I'm so glad you posted on this Brenda. It is after all, your blog and YOU determine it's contents!! Life is not always rose petals and diamonds…we need to know the good and the bad to make good decisions in our lives. We learn this from our family, friends, and peers. You are helping us all to see life as it is. I wish it was different for Christine and her family, and my prayers go out to God to please comfort them. I'm so glad you let us know about her. Keep writing whatever you feel and think. I appreciate your blog more than you'll ever know. Hugs!

  31. This so sad, Brenda and yes it can happen to anyone. I wish I had "known" Christine when she was alive.

    As for people telling you what to do and what to say and where to say it. That makes me so mad! I have many blogs I follow but only a handful that I make sure I read EVERY day. Yours is one and do you know why? Because it's real! Not always pretty or cheerful but always real. Don't change.

    Today's post has given me a second wind. I got my first nasty comment a week and a half ago which I thought didn't really affect me much but I've been avoiding blogs – writing or reading. I seriously considered just dropping anything to do with blogs because I don't need any more crap in my life. Your post today made me change my mind. I would hate anyone influencing you to change or stop blogging. I blog for me – not for anyone else. Especially not for some anonymous coward that won't put her name to her opinion. Please don't change -you inspire me. xo J

  32. I am very sad to hear of the death of this young woman and her so . How senseless and tragic! As a woman who has married 2 very dysfunctional, seriously flawed men I can understand how a woman can find herself in a horrendous situation and not knowing how she got there. With neither of my husbands did I have a clue to the depth of their problems until we had been married for some time. Thank The Lord, neither of them was physically violent but easily could have become that way.
    As to the content of your blog posts – I love the posts about decorating, your adorable dogs, gardening, etc but my favorites are the ones in which you share your personal struggles and related issues. We must not live in isolation and by reading each other's stories we art encouraged and strengthened. We are not alone in dealing with very difficult situations. Please don't stop being real! Those who are uncomfortable with these types of blogs can go elsewhere. There are plenty of writers out there who focus on decorating, etc.

  33. Continued…
    I too want to write my story, and I include the mental wards he put me in when I finally told what he was doing to me and the children, yet, I do not know my starting point. My family of origin gives my full permission to do so by their continued emotional, verbal, and mental abuse, castigation and public humiliation. I have vivid memory, and with the artist in me, have cases of files and writings which I have saved for the day. I want to bring forth to our young people, to parents, law enforcement, courts and physicians that it begins in our homes, that our children will seem to listen to our words, however, the act upon our actions. It is not love… more of an addiction… as in the Adrenalin of the drama, which is a drug, giving much endorphin rush, as does the power over another. I am sure most abused will dispute this, which is expected, however, it takes at least a year of removing oneself completely from all communication and eye-sight of all who are unhealthy and toxic to them. Painful, more than I can express with word, almost a crazy mental anguish since one knows no other way, but none the less, a stage one must experience to believe it. I married what I was comfortable with, what I was raised with and by, because it was my normal. Yet, since I was a babe, I was always different than my 8 siblings, and to this day, still considered the black sheep. It was not I who was imprisoned for drug dealing, and not I who abused my spouse, or robbed bars or stole from stores. It was not I that is famed for his con abilities or need to seduce his best friends/sibling's wives, to the point of rape, yet, I am the "bad" child. I owned this mentality of disgrace until now, and none, not even my ex, has ever been held accountable, much less experience their own shame. I carried it for all of them. No longer do I, no longer will I! Brenda, thank you for your courage, for in you I have found the courage to do what I know I am called to do. Do I know my platform, not at this time. I believe that America is a great country. I feel privilege to be an American, yet, if one strips away the outer layer, knocks down the white picket fences, opens the doors and windows, the true greed, violence, racism, and jealousy's of our nature will be exposed. Love is not an ownership, nor is it power over another, disloyalty, character assassination, manipulation, dishonesty, and pain. Love is something selfless, respectful and more powerful than any fist. It cherishes and encourages, and most of all pure honesty. I must close and get myself to work, but please, all who read Brenda's post, and my comments, know that none of us are immune to the dance of violence. It can come in pretty packages, blooming roses and bountiful bows, but it is still violence. Do not think for one moment in time that if you are not physically stuck, you are not living in violence. For the violence inflicted in your mind is worse than any punch in the mouth. If you allow this around your children, if you allow your children to be hurt, mental or physical, you are changing the child for his lifetime. You are robbing him of what his is called to do in his life, destroying invention and creativity, and allowing your inner self-hatred to live on inside of him. Yes, it is contagious. Love to you, Brenda. Today I feel blessed. MJ Agles (Yes, I am proud to sign this post!)

  34. Brenda, I just arrived at work (not yet on the clock), and no, I have not had the time to read all of the comments. I will, I assure you, later this evening when at home. My reason for a response is one of great knowledge, first hand, and the blessing of my emancipation from the fist of a sadist and Psychopath. If you name any atrocity that a person can do to their spouse, I have endured it. Without exaggeration or embellishment, beyond all natures of earth, I should not be breathing the air of life. If it were not for his keen sense of prey, I would not. I am soon to be sixty-three come January, yet, I am plagued with horrendous PTSD, as well both covert/overt witness of the outcome in my children. I can answer any question presented by a person who does not comprehend, yet no one wants to hear it. Why, because it presents a subject most of us, abused and not, want to recognize with. To recognize is to think, not in a rationalizing, enabling, justifiable reason, as well as to relate to things possibly present in our own relationship. I fully believe that this subject is taboo in most minds, because of this. And, if this is present and related to, one must act to resolve. Right? And how many people want to face this?
    I am an artist, writer, designer, and wonderful homemaker, and have been not only beat for my talents, but just because they can. I state this because only now do I have the courage to be the person my God has created at first breath across my face, leaving my siblings/family members of control and abusive nature, to be fully emancipated. My ex spouse lives in Indiana with his second wife whom he beats as he did me. I watched this woman, dynamic, outgoing, well dressed, personable, and attractive descend, or shall I say, plummet into the depths of despair and abusive programming as what happened to me. We spoke before the marriage and she tried to get away from him, yet, in his masterful, fabricating manipulations, she submitted.

  35. This makes me feel terrible. Murder/suicides are just becoming all too common. Anytime someone (like you) has a forum to express themselves on behalf of women that are being threatened, they should go for it and never look back. You're doing a good thing, Brenda. We applaud you. And of course my heart goes out to the family of this beautiful woman and her child.


  36. Oh thank you Brenda for posting this. we would not have known. her life should stand for something. this needs to be out there for her. to give her that last voice. maybe it will give hope to someone else too. tears tears tears- why are men so controlling, needy, demanding and violent. thinking they own women. her poor son. at least they are still together. this just makes me so angry. having dealt with this issue in my job recently, asking a man to leave for fear of him killing his ex. heartbreaking the violence against women and children. we have to stand up and stand out against it. share safe places for these families to go and help them. it is hard. I have had to call the police about this man here myself and report threats to me. had police come to my work several times. why why why- and i happens all the time. thanks so much for letting us know. shame on any negative comments here. we should not keep silent about this abuse – not in this day. thank you Brenda for standing up and standing out.

  37. As horrific as this story is…we need to hear it…and you need to tell it. Please keep writing about all sorts of things, the good and the bad. And if someone doesn't like it…they don't have to read it! Domestic violence is an evil that we must be informed about…because it can and does happen to so many!

  38. When you are criticized for what you write, then you know you're on to something.

    Never, ever, ever censor what you feel like writing. It is what makes you and your blog so unique and well loved.

    I'm very saddened to hear of this tragic news. Thank you for bringing this subject to light Brenda.

  39. That is so sad and tragic! Brenda, please write whatever is in your heart and/or on your mind. We as readers have the choice to read or not! The majority of us want it real. Your blog has become one of my vey favorites!!! Thank you!

  40. Brenda, What a sad, sad story! I am so sorry for the loss of this woman and her son. I feel so horrible for her other children as well. I'm not sure that I ever had the pleasure of reading her blog. Anyway, your blog is like your home. It's all yours and represents you, what you care about, what you're interested in, what you believe and stand for. It's not anyone's right to tell you what you can and can't do inside your home. People don't have to visit if they don't like it. I really don't understand negative comments at all. If you don't like it leave, no one is being forced to visit a blog. I like your blog a lot! I'm a pretty new follower and I'm very interested in the midst of some of these issues you're working your way out of. I'm rooting for you! Love, ~ Jamie

  41. The one thing I have discovered with all the blogs that I read is that they are a microcosm of life and in this case, death. Sharing the good And the bad is one of the qualities that draw people back to blogs and bring humanity to the written word and also brings us all closer. This is such a tragedy and we need to recognize and support situations that we see are in crisis. My heart goes out to her and her family.

  42. Dear Brenda ~ I've read Christine's blog in the past and this news is devastating. Just horrible! My heart goes out to family and friends she and her son left behind, and even those of the husband. What a horrible thing to happen.

    She worked so hard in caring for her family.

    Domestic violence is an evil.

    Thank you for bringing this issue up here. I'm just sorry for the loss of Christine and her son.


  43. Brenda I am so sorry to read of this sad tragedy in Michigan. This kind of violence can not be tolerated. So glad you put words and a face to this crime on one in the blogger community and her son. Life is real and happening beyond the pages of our blog posts and not everything is pretty pics and decorations.
    My heart and prayers go out to the family. May God bring justice to this loss!!
    Celestina Marie

  44. Brenda,
    I applaud you for bringing to light the threat that exists out in the world to so many women.

    My sister's best friend and next door neighbor was stabbed to death in her kitchen while her 2 daughters slept upstairs by her husband and their own Father. He was later killed in prison and I felt that justice was then served.
    I have worked as a nurse in a hospital for 35 years and since nursing is predominately a "female profession", I have seen my share of domestic violence with co workers.
    One co worker was shot and killed while picking up her 2 year old daughter after a visit with her father. She was killed right in front of her daughter.. He later tried to commit suicide by shooting himself in the head but , unfortunately, lived and is spending the rest of his life in prison.

    A good friend of mine left her abusive husband and he came to my door looking for her. He even tried to pay my husband for information on her.
    I could probably write a book on this subject. I even had a patient that we hid in ICU from her husband and he later walked into the bakery where she worked and shot and killed her in front of customers.

    I . personally, feel that these men are the worst type of predators out there. They prey on women that they can control, physically, mentally and financially and when the woman finally stands up for herself and her family, he kills her and sometimes his own children.
    In these cases. I DO beleive in the death penality!

    My thoughts and prayers are with Christine and her son and their family. At least she is free now of him because she is in heaven and there is no way, he will get to bother her there since he will rot in Hell…..

    Brenda, don't pay attention to what people say. This is an important topic that women need to know about and talk about so I say BRAVO for you!!


  45. I live in Michigan about an hours drive from Lansing. I heard about the tragedy but was unfamiliar with Christine until now. This is heartbreaking news. Many years ago I lost one of my cousins to domestic violence and it still stings. Thank you for taking up the cause.

  46. All I'm going to say, as everyone else above has said it much better than I, is don't let the blog Nazis control you or your blog with their smarmy pants opinions. They're pathetic little people with small minds, living in big pretty houses in worlds they imagine are so perfect, and they are clueless, clueless, clueless as to how quickly it can all come crashing down. Violence against women and children isn't confined to any neighborhood, race, creed or socio-economic group. Some of the worst abusers may, in fact, live in those big pretty houses. There are thousands of real women out here, and we want to know what each other is thinking as well as doing. I'm never offended by REAL.

  47. All of us very likely know abuse victims, and we should all be aware of it and how to help. That is why there are shelters which is where I like to donate my things. It happens in every strata of life, and this story is so tragic. And so unnecessary. I would never try to silence you. This needs to be told, even amongst the tinsel and the glitter. Especially amongst the tinsel and the glitter because the holidays often put extra stress in people. I am glad you spoke out, Brenda!



  48. Brenda ~ Thank you for letting us know about Christine and her son and bringing more awareness of this issue. You are right – we need to talk about it more and realize that there are many, many women in similar circumstances as Christine. It's devastating.

  49. Brenda,

    Although I had never come across Christine's blog, her face, with that sweet smile, carrying that sign that she must have been so proud to make and hold high, is one of hope and love, and this has hit me, hard. We hear of domestic violence and such tragedies all the time, so much that I am afraid it is becoming something that the world is mindlessly swallowing up, without fully digesting its devastating effects on mankind. The consequences, needless to say, are that such heinous acts continue to occur, across the globe, independent of age, race, education, and class. Aren't we full yet? What will it take to put an end to this horror before other innocent lives are taken well before their time? It is clear that a 'recipe' for awareness, action and support is long due. Your post today is one step closer to such a crusade, and I support you 100% in any effort you undertake in keeping Christine's, and 'every Christine's' battle and memory alive.

    Thanks for caring so much, and taking the time to write what you intrinsically feel needs to be read. I appreciate it and would miss your integrity and talent if you didn't, not to mention the fact that it could save lives.

    My prayers go out to the family of Christine and her son.


  50. Just think Brenda that if you wouldn't have told us people would have thought that she just got tired of blogging or some other reason. By writing this post you have honored her and her son. She will NOT be forgotten! She was not just another statistic, she was a loving human being. Her "husband" may have taken her life. But he could never possible take the the memories that people who love her have. Not sure that i am wording that right. Her physical life is gone, but her spritural life lives on in the people she loved.
    I knew 3 women who were killed by their "husbands". Only one "husband' commited suicide. ( I write the word husband like that as there is no way that they deserve that title. Husbands are strong, loving people, not controlling idiots!). All 3 were trying to leave. So when people say that all she has to do is leave I can't leave that statement pass. Prayers for Christine's and son's family and friends.
    Please as I have told you before keep writing what you want to. People can read it or leave it. No one is putting it in front of their eyes and forcing them to read what they don't agree with. No one says that we have to agree with what everyone posts about. Isn't blogging suppose to make you think about things? Sometimes we start out thinking one way about something and ending up seeing another side to it. Something new to think about and that can really round out the way you think. We might still not agree, but we need to see why someone feels that way about the same subject. I am so glad that you let us comment on this post. Don't let one or two people dictate what you write about. Hugs, Teresa

  51. Dear Brenda, Such a very sad and tragic event. I immediately prayed for their souls and for the grief of their family and friends that loved them. Your blog belongs to you. You share with all of us your life, past and present. You speak from your heart and through your experiences. I check for your posts every day. I love this site. You make me think about life and the effects events can have on ourselves and others. You have put a spotlight on loneliness , financial struggle, families, divorce,love, friendship, value of having loving pets, photography,gardening, neighbors and I could go on and on. Please always continue to write whatever you feel you want, too.I believe you intelligently inform. Not all subjects are comfortable to face. True. In this age of instant news and little censoring of exposure, it is not prudent to not talk about and be knowledgeable in happenings of social and moral attacks. Abuse, domestic and all others is a cold fact If anyone does not care for your post, then I suggest that They are the ones to censor viewing your blog. You have been doing it just fine. Smile and hugs, Betty

  52. What a terrible tragedy. It is so sad that many women and children have to go through this same fear and tragedy ever day around the world. Please don't ever stop writing whatever speaks to your heart. It is your blog and if people don't like it or are uncomfortable, then so be it. Write anyway.

  53. Don't worry about the negative people, they are always there….like flies….lol….you do what is right for you! I know all too well about divorce and being afraid. I was married to a man that I loved with all my heart. The fact that he wanted the divorce, out of the blue, made me realize that we don't always know what is in another persons' mind…..and made me afraid of what a man who never raised a hand to me might do…..

  54. Well yes, of course we need to comment about this. This dear precious lady and her son, murdered by the man who should have protected and cared for them. And it happens way too often, you read it in the paper. Perhaps he had mental illness – and the government consistently cuts funding for that essential need! I had a friend many years ago who was a victim of domestic violence. I tried to help her escape but it came down to this: her fear of what he would do if she left was greater than her fear of what he was doing to her while she stayed. The story went downhill from there including her spending time in jail for taking money, probably at his command. Tragedy, all these stories are pure tragedy. I send my thoughts to her remaining family who are, I'm certain, heart broken. Perhaps, probably, they tried to help her, but like my friend perhaps fear overwhelmed her. I'm just so sorry to hear this, another set of victims. Thanks, Brenda, that this is your blog, your place to write what your heart wants to say, and those who don't want to hear it can so easily click off. I have your back.

  55. This is such a tragic story that words fail me. My heart and prayers go out to her surviving children.
    Please don't let anyone try to control what you want to write about on your own blog. Life in the real world isn't always pretty or sweet.

  56. How terribly sad, these deaths. How terribly sad that people try to dictate what you blog about and make you feel bad. My belief is that if they don't want to read about any of this then they can go to the upper right hand corner and X out of the page. So many people think that life is all rosy and happy all of the time, now wouldn't that be nice if it were true. I wanted my blog to be a happy place, but my husband got sick and after almost 2 and 1/2 years of dealing with his illness and caring for him 24/7, I had to vent about it. The last thing I wanted to do was to make my blog a sad place, but there was a lot of supportive people out there who were kind enough to stick by me and offer some compassion. None of us want bad things to happen to us, but they do….life is what happens when you planned something else. Not everyone's life is perfect and plenty of us struggle. Not everyone talks about it, but maybe they should. Maybe it would prevent things like husbands killing their wives and children.

  57. Brenda, this is a tragedy that happens all to often. I'm glad you wrote about this. I don't understand how people can think that it could never happen to them. Abusers are often very charming and slowly whittle away your self-confidence. It' often subtle and then progresses. This is incredibly sad and a tragedy. This is your blog Brenda so write about the issues that have meaning to you. One of the main reasons I come hear is that you share your heart and mind and approach so many different issues. It's not just about decorating and you approach the difficult subjects that people don't want to address.

  58. Hi Brenda, I will continue to support you 100%! The reason I check in everyday is BECAUSE you write so openly and honestly. I get bored with the blogs with perfect pics and nothing interesting to say. You are my inspiration dear friend. You have been thru hell and back and your darling home is a comfort to me. I too, live alone since Jeff died a little over 3 years ago. It is sooo easy to cocoon myself and not pay attention to my home. I use to decorate all the time. But I lost my desire after Jeff died. But you, sweet Brenda inspire me to decorate, but even more than that, you make me stop and THINK! SO to the naysayers…. I say… get lost. If you don't have anything encouraging to say to Brenda, go away.

    NOW! About the this tragic situation where Christine was murdered along with her child?????? It angers me beyond words. For anyone out there who thinks this could never happen to you or your loved ones…. Visit an emergency room for a week and observe all the abused women and children who come thru the doors. These women and children are from EVERY walk of life. No one is ever guaranteed they wont come across a violent man. Sometimes you know them. Most abused women and children DO know their abusers. It a horrific problem in our society. I just cannot wrap my head around this insanity. My heart is broken. We are coming up on the 1 yr anniv of the nightmare last Dec at Sandy Hook. There were multiple innocent children and adults killed by a maniac. Now here we are again, in the Christmas season and another tragedy caused by a maniac. I sure don't have the answers. I wished I did. But Thank you for sharing this post with us Brenda. Keep blogging like YOU feel compelled to write. You have a lot of followers who care about you and we look forward to your insightful writing.


  59. Brenda, this is absolutely heartbreaking.This happened to someone we knew when my daughters were young. It is devastating. As a counselor I worked with abused women. It should never be hushed up. Thanks so much for sharing this. xo Laura

  60. My deepest sympathy to Christine's family. This is such a sad story and my heart breaks for what Christine and her son must have been subjected too. My cousin was shot and killed by her estranged husband and then he killed himself. Their two young daughters were in the room and saw the entire thing. It has been six years and these girls are still having a hard time dealing with it.

    If a man tells you he will kill you PLEASE take it seriously and do whatever is possible to protect yourself and your children.

  61. What a heartbreak. It's fun to write fun posts, but there are times that life is more important than fun. Thanks for using your blog to bring attention to this critical issue.

  62. Brenda, this is so tragic, my heart goes out to her family, what a horrible thing to happen to her.

    Regarding your subject matter, please keep writing about this, If you hadn't written about what you were going through with your husband, and your problems before, I can't begin to imagine how many woman would not have had a friend to turn to. You are starting a difficult conversation, and yes there are going to be awkward silences, not everyone is going to want to acknowledge that these things happen, or that it could be anyone they know.

    Those are the people that need to make the choice not to read your posts, because you are helping more women, then you will offend. If even one woman finds comfort, and the strength to change her situation, then imagine how she can help others, it's like ripples in a pond.

    There are always going to be those who don't agree with what we write, it's their choice, and they can choose not to follow your blog, there will be many others who will.


  63. Keep writing what you want to write about because it is your blog. There is already enough fluff and hot air in Blog Land to float the Titanic.

    This is a tragic story that is all too common. I once wrote on my other blog about my own experience being married to an abuser a long time ago. I was very, very fortunate to get away from him without losing my life or that of my son. It is bizarre to me as one who has been there that people do look askance at you if they know that you had this experience, like you somehow brought it on yourself. My only crime was being young and naive, and perhaps guilty of bad judgment of character. Sometimes these abusers come wrapped up in very charming packages.

    I did not know this blogger, but this is an incredibly tragic ending. If anything good can come of such a sad tale, your shining a light on it might help someone else. Keep on shining.

  64. Hi Brenda. I am so sorry to hear the sad news about Christine and her son. I would not know about it if you had not posted it, so I appreciate it that you did. But if you had chosen not to post it, that would have been your decision too, and yours alone since this is your blog. Each and every day, you get to decide what appears here. We can decide if we want to read it or not. I visit this blog often because I have a similar decorating style, and also because I have had a few somewhat similar life experiences. So, I always find something to ponder. Keep up the good work.

  65. How horribly sad and tragic. Thank you for bringing these sensitive subjects to light. And hey, it's your blog, you can write about whatever you want. Someone doesn't like it – they don't have to read it. Blessings to you…

  66. I know you must be glad that you did not disable the comments, you are getting feed back galore!
    I am also glad that you posted this and why not on your very popular decorating blog? More will read it that way and understand the gravity of this situation.
    I understand some of what this woman went through. Many years ago, another lifetime it feels like, my then husband attempted to kill me and but for the grace of God I would not be here today. I moved myself and my children to my parents place soon after until I could get a job, while he was off with one of his many flings. Boy was he mad when he got home and found that I had packed up and left him. It was a good thing that I was with my dad and mom. He threatened to kill my dad for moving us away. My dad told him to come on and try. Thankfully he didn't. Funny thing was, no matter how bad he was, my "friends" did not want to be part of breaking up a marriage! What!?!?! They would not help me for that reason. I talk very straight to women when I fear they and/or their children are in a dangerous position, because tragedies such as this one that you mentioned do happen!! I know first hand. Thank you for bringing this up, it's something that we need to talk about!
    Kudos to you Brenda, Cindy

  67. So sorry for this tragic loss. Brenda, you write about real life and what is on your mind. Please keep doing so, and don't let anyone stifle you. We are on the blogosphere because we need to share. Keep sharing!

  68. Such a sad and tragic story, but one we need to hear. Keep writing from your heart Brenda, there will always be those that come to read it. I recently wrote a tough post and thought twice about it before I hit the publish button, but I'm glad I did.

  69. Brenda, I just today watched a little you tube video on someone who had survived domestic violence. It made me so heart sick for what some people suffer in this life. Then I read your blog post and it just make me shake all over with sadness. My heart breaks for all the loved ones of this woman; but I immediately thought of her mother as I cannot imagine what it must feel like to lose a daughter in such a tragic way. Thank you for the reminder to pray. ~ Dori ~

  70. How horrible for this family! Domestic violence is an ugly fact that we must not ignore! I applaud you for addressing this issue on your blog. Life is not always about sunshine and roses. We must find ways to rescue families from this violence!!!

  71. How devastating, Brenda! My heart goes out to her family and surviving young children. A few years ago, this same thing happened across the alley from my parent's and nobody heard a thing. It's a small peaceful town, which goes to show that it doesn't matter when or where, it happens in all walks of life. So very sad.

  72. My prayers are going for the children that are left to battle tyhis tragedy! When is spouse abuse ever gonna end!!! How totally sad, no words to describe this tragedy! Thank you for sharing.

  73. so sad reading this today…I feel bad for all involved..domestic violence needs to be addressed more than it is…it has been going on for years…maybe someone reading this will get help because of it…we all need to be more aware of our friends and what they go through in every day life…so many women try to hidse it is why they end up getting hurt or killed…its a hard subject because of the silence…so sad! Carol

  74. Such a tragic loss. I can't express how much this hurts, terrifies and angers me. This is no way to die for her and her precious son, at the hands of a mad man. My prayers are with her young children left behind. I am glad you shared this Brenda, she was indeed our blogging sister. Diane

  75. Heartbreaking and there are no adequate words for this loss. There are however, ways that we can help to prevent this type of thing from happening again. It is really up to us to provide safe havens for those who are living in fear of abuse. I think that as a community of bloggers we can and should do something. There is always power in numbers and the power of the message. The best we can do in this tragic situation is to work towards the prevention of other acts of domestic violence. Brenda, I do believe that you are the voice for such a movement.

    Susan and Bentley

  76. Afraid… hell yes afraid!!! Be afraid!! Be very afraid!!!!! Sorry but this is just horrible. I was VERY afraid in my situation for many years. But I did not know what was wrong!!!!! I would like to be an advocate for women who know something is wrong but cant figure it out. OR who are afraid. and see what happened. This is just tragic. Brenda I thank you so much for sharing this. MANY women are afraid!!!!! We need to see it and do something. I am afraid of when my ex gets out of prison. YES VERY AFRAID!!!!! and it may very likely be this month with a pardon from our governer. Yes I am very afraid.

  77. And I am very convicted by this. I want to get the word out…. just because your husband says he loves and you love him with all your heart….. let him get on meth and see what happens. Unbeknowest to me he was a seller, a taker, and a maker!!!! I divorced him and he is in prison. I shudder to think how my life was in a danger zone for so many years.

  78. This is YOUR blog and you should write what you want to write. Anyone that doesn't care for a particular post or the blog in general should just not read that post or the blog in general. No one is forcing them to read this blog or any other blog. The rest of us read because we like variety and life as if really is. I am angry that anyone would dare to tell a blogger what to write. Readers have the freedom not to read anything they don't want to read, and the writer has free speech to write as they see fit. I also think that if a blogger feels the need to turn off comments, so they are not subjected to verbal abuse, then so be it.
    My heart goes out to this young woman and her child killed so tragically. There has not been enough done to prevent such domestic violence.

  79. This is just horrible! Women just say it cant happen to them. Well so not the case women!!! It could have happened to me with the man I loved with all my heart and soul!!!! IT CAN HAPPEN TO ANYONE!!! I don't care how much your husband loves you!!!!! I am living proof!! This is just so sad. Toooo sad!!!!

  80. I have seen domestic violence and it is horrible. I was at one point afraid of my last husband and feel so lucky that I got out and away and he did not pursue me. I could easily have been a statistic. It is something we must not push under the carpet because it isn't 'pretty' or 'cute' of 'happy'. Life is not all Christmas trees and presents. Brenda you have power with your words and I hope you never edit something you feel convicted to say! The one's that don't like it can just go somewhere else and bury their heads in the sand!

  81. Oh how incredible sad! This story makes my heart ache. Thank you so much for bring up the subject, you are so right, these women need our support and help not our censorship!

    I for one hope that you will continue to make this little slice of blogland whatever you want it to be. Life is not always sunshine and rainbows and I think it is wonderful that you have the courage to remind people of that from time to time. Forget the negative nancy's out there, keep doing what your doing. In the end we all must do what we feel is right in out hearts.

  82. Thank you for writing what is in your heart. Yes this is sad but raising awareness is the only way that we will be able to do something about this problem. I am a domestic abuse survivor, I say survivor because I made it out of my situation… past the first few days which are the most dangerous time when your abuser may kill you and beyond that surviving the years of harassment because I did get away. My heart goes out to this woman and her family, such a tragic loss.

  83. I am so sorry to hear of such heartbreaking news. I will definitely keep Christine's loved ones in my prayers. I am thankful for your posts, Brenda. Your blog is articulate, interesting, and most importantly, real. Portrayals of "perfect" homes, families, jobs, and lives are just dishonest. Life gets messy and when it does, it's good to know that we're not alone.

  84. I have made a quick framed image in support of the life of Christine Keith. I think we as bloggers should form an alliance, showing our support of victims of domestic violence. Let me know what ideas you can bring to the table. Just by having that in my sidebar, I am showing women that I know it's out there, and I'm not turning away. If someone with more talent in graphics wants to create a better tribute, please do. This one isn't that great. I will write a page about her and link to it soon. Please copy if you want.

    1. I want to be a part of this Brenda, this subject is not talked about enough, and we as women should be supportive of each other, and do what we can to let women know that this is not something to be ashamed of, or ignored.

  85. Such a tragedy for her and her son, and the little ones left behind. It is just senseless, now they have no mother or father, for that matter. This is definitely an issue that needs to be addresses, especially now with our volatile society. One thing I think people think that just because a restraining order has been issued they will be safe, but that is not the fact. They are no security for our safety at all. So, please, Brenda, you write about this important issue all you want. We never know just who might be touched by it.

  86. As the song goes " say what you want to say and let the words fall out- I want to see you be brave"
    It's your blog, say what you want to say! Life isn't always pretty and ignoring subjects like this doesn't make them not happen. Maybe a post you write will touch the right person at the right time and they can find the bravery they need.
    I faithfully read your blog every day and will continue to do so.

  87. Dear sweet friend,
    I cannot comprehend such cruelty from a husband and father. My comment is for you—this is your blog. Your posts are yours. If a person does not want to read your writing, he or she can "click" or go elsewhere. I look forward to your blog. Forget about those negative people. Unfortunately they are with us. Wish I could send sunshine from middle TN.

  88. What a horrific story. It is beyond sad. I agree with everything that has been said above, Brenda. Always write what is in your heart or on your mind, and never mind what the nay sayers email to you.


    1. How dreadfully tragic that her life and her sons should have ended by this terribly selfish act of the father and husband… to be so enraged that he killed both of them is beyond my reasoning, but poor girl she didnt really expect that to happen.. This domestic violence is a hidden evil that is met each and every day by somebody.. it doesnt matter if rich or poor these people lead terribly sad lives when one partner is so violent. Don't stop writing, you are doing good in bringing these tales to be looked at and commented on.. blogging is for letting off steam, creating and whatever else you feel y ou wish to write about.. that is lawful and legal of course… your blog is one I read regularly… RIP poor lady and her son.. prayers will help her grieving family, but it should never have happened..

  89. I have read her blog before. How incredibly sad that she was not able to escape from the violence until it was too late. Domestic violence is much more common that people realize. I think about a friend who everyone envied for years until the truth came out. She, and he, hid it so well.

    I come across blogs that don't interest me and I just move on. Write what pleases you or you feel needs to be brought to the attention of others.

  90. I'm with your responded above. The post is terribly tragic, but you should feel perfectly justified in writing what you want, a blog is personal, regardless if some reader only wants to read happy things! If that's the case, they can skip that post…it's your blog, do what you want with it, even if you want to turn off the comments…they can go make their own blog and do what they want, conversely. It's funny that people feel since your out here with your electronic journal, you have to follow their rules…it's your baby, do what you wish. I just found your blog, too, and will certainly be back.

  91. Words are not sufficient for the loss of this woman and her son. Domestic violence is quite prevalent. As an RN who worked with felons I know how families are completely and forever destroyed. This is your blog and goodness gracious you determine it's content.

  92. Brenda, it's true, we sometimes don't know how to respond in a comment, because words are hard to come by, but that doesn't mean we don't need to know these things. As far as I'm concerned a blog is about "life", yes we want to share the "pretty" pictures, but we also care about you (and others), personally. Write what's on your heart, and share with us, and keep us aware.

  93. Please don't stop writing about real life things. These things happen to women more then some people want to know and they should know that every ones life is not a perfect blog.
    This is so sad what happened to Christine and her son just for trying to do the right thing.
    She was a strong women to stand up to such horror. Thank you for sharing this. Yes great idea on getting a blogging platform on this subject.

  94. You my friend, are "salt of the earth", that is why I follow you. The world is not alway's a cheerful, wonderful place as some people like to"pretend". Write what move's you, the good and bad, I'll still follow you no matter what. Thank you for standing up and speaking out!!! My heart goes out to her and her family.You are realistic , no matter how uncomfortable it may make other's feel, you did the right thing!!

    1. I so agree with Tammy, Brenda! Thank you for giving Christine and her son another voice, another "remembering". You are you, and we all have something special to share. Thank you for never being anything but who you are, friend! xo

    2. I so agree with Tammy, Brenda! Thank you for giving Christine and her son another voice, another "remembering". You are you, and we all have something special to share. Thank you for never being anything but who you are, friend! xo

  95. Dearest Brenda..
    I am appalled to think someone would tell you to take your depressing posts elsewhere!
    Since when has Blogland become ONLY for Pretty subjects..?
    I Know for a fact we are granted Freedom of Speech in this country,
    You and I and all the other bloggers write about happenings in their world, no censorship, just our thoughts and opinions on whatever subject matter we so choose.!
    First.. do NOT change your style of writing, nor your topics and especially your Brendaisms..
    Although i do not always comment, you can bet i do read your posts!
    I may not agree with your opinions, or your style of decorating..that is what makes each of us so uniquely Brenda..or Lou!!
    Lastly, just like TV programs…where we have the on/off button..
    here inn blogging we also have the choice to read, follow or simply ignore!
    ignore those critics..Keep on Blogging!
    we appreciate and love you!!

  96. How very, very sad. I have only just found your blog (via Thistlebear). You should of course write exactly what you please, and ignore those who aren't nice. I like reading strong posts, and I will definitely visit your space again.

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