What My Year Looked Like In 2022
Today I’m looking back at what my year looked like in 2022. Lots of things happened. I moved, lost little Gracie Mae, had ankle surgery, and am now in physical therapy.
First, I moved here to these apartments in late January. I moved from a one bedroom with 725 square feet at one complex to a two bedroom with 1150 square feet at this one.
The two bedroom is actually larger than the house I rented when I first moved to Tulsa.
The Wonderful Teri:
I was in a lot of ankle pain, so a kind friend and reader, Teri, called and offered to help pack me up to move here. (She also unpacked, by the way). I couldn’t believe someone would be so generous with their time!
She did exactly that. I ordered boxes and all the things necessary to pack and move, and she went to work. She drove in from a little town outside of Tulsa and got things done.
Teri was there with me when the movers moved me in and stayed to help for a few weeks after that.
Losing Gracie Mae:
I moved here with Ivy and little Gracie, who I adopted in September. She was the sweetest little thing.
We were only here a short time when I walked into my bedroom one night and found her dead.
I still cry every time I think about little Gracie. The vet said maybe she had some congenital condition we didn’t know about.
But I thought I had years with that little white kitten with the pretty blue eyes. In reality she was only here with me and Ivy for six month. Her life was cut short and I’ll never know why.
I’m sitting here crying so hard I can barely see the screen in front of me.
I watch over Ivy like a hawk because of losing Gracie like that.
Decorating:
Then I went about decorating as best I could with this painful ankle my first few months here.
I know you’re probably missing decorating posts, but I’m doing what I physically can at this point. I’ve been given strict instructions by my physical therapist to not do very much.
How fun is that when you move somewhere new? Not at all fun! But I’ve tried; doing my ankle exercises and being careful.
Greg said he wished he had cameras in my apartment so he could see what all I’m doing. Well, it isn’t much.
Anyway, I attempted to garden in the shade on my patio and yard. There were lots of stumbles along the way because of the many tree roots pushing up sidewalks and pathways here.
The trees are absolutely beautiful, but having many large trees in one complex bring problems along with them.
The New Pathway:
I paid a neighbor’s grandson to create a pathway for me in back because it was so hard for me to navigate in my walking boot.
And I have to say that I love what he accomplished with that pathway, but it did not solve my problem. I still have to get from the patio down a very bumpy brick walkway to get to the path.
Getting my knee scooter down it is really, really hard.
There’s no way I can get around this complex on my knee scooter. So I’m pretty much stuck indoors. I may have to look into getting an all-terrain knee scooter.
I had ankle surgery the end of June 2022. Steve next door was and is a tremendous help to me. Though he’s 13 years my senior, he’s in perfect health and has absolutely no mobility problems.
Steve unfortunately lost his wife of 53 years about a week after I moved in here.
My girls help when they can, but they both have full-time jobs and kids to deal with and little time aside from that.
Physical Therapy:
I began physical therapy just a few weeks after surgery, which meant going out. After two trips it was obvious that was going to be a problem. So I was approved for at-home physical therapy.
Greg, who has specialized in this type of physical therapy for more than 20 years, comes here twice a week. And I just love him because he’s so helpful, very patient, and he can make me laugh. (Laughing is its own therapy).
He also does the odd job for me when it comes to any type of lifting, or taking out the trash for me.
He’s even told me if I need something done, to please not attempt it by myself. He said I could call or text him and he would come do it. Now that’s one caring and kind physical therapist.
After a few months, my time was up with that agency. And then I was approved for another agency that is more long-term. And Greg is still my physical therapist. He works for both of them.
I did great for about two months, then began to backslide. I’d gain traction in terms of walking, and then backslide and fall behind.
Back Pain:
For the past month I’ve had lots of back pain contribute to my lack of not being able to walk. I’m back to limping again unfortunately. And my ankle is hurting again.
The surgeon told me from the start that he would go in and repair torn tendons and do what he could, but gave me no promises. He said surgery might not help me at all. And I’m glad he was truthful.
I had high hopes.
At this point, I think my back is probably a bit off from wearing the walking boot on one foot all the time. I’ve had to wear a walking boot off and on for ten years now.
So we’re just inching along in physical therapy. We haven’t even gotten to a point where I can attempt to do strengthening exercises. Because to do that, Greg said I’d have to be able to stand on my right foot for a time.
Frustration:
Whatever it is, my walking is not going well right now. I get frustrated and cry sometimes because I virtually missed last summer’s gardening season. Well, I did garden for a time during the spring before the surgery in June. But then I was indoors.
So I have so been looking forward to the gardening season of 2023. Now I’m beginning to wonder if I’m going to be able to do much. There’s no way at this point to know.
My surgeon said it would take a year to heal. But I’m not going to get my hopes up like I did the first few months.
Aging:
I’ll be 66 in February, so I’m no spring chicken.
There really are no more ways to surgically fix the problem. I’ve discussed it with a number of surgeons and doctors.
Too many things went wrong, both when I fell and afterward. The tendons around my ankle were torn after the second surgery just from the stress of walking.
I’m trying to stay upbeat. For a short time I was able to walk to the parking lot, which is about 30-40 feet from my apartment door. But then I started having problems and pain doing that, and now I’m trying not to go out there unless I have to.
Driving in the boot isn’t safe anyway, though I’ve done it off and on for ten years. But I find that when I’m in pain, my driving ability isn’t all that great.
Some have mentioned that I could walk to the parking lot in my walking boot, and then put regular shoes on to drive. But there’s pain even driving with the walking boot on. So that’s out.
Thus I’ve crashed into the poles that hold up the roof alongside my parking space twice now. My car is 17 years old, but it still drives quite well.
Where I Am Now:
So that’s about where I am just a few days before 2023 begins.
I order groceries and whatever else I need online so it’s delivered to me. And I have my apartment cleaned twice a month because I can no longer do it myself.
Last Saturday I sat here in my wonderful chair from Relax The Back and cried off and on for much of the day. I just needed to indulge myself and let it out. The frustration, disappointment, and pain build up until it overflows.
I already had gardening plans swirling around in my head. The idea of being able to take my own trash to the dumpster; to walk around the complex and take photos of the wildlife. All that is just not possible at this point.
I just yearn for some degree of independence. Who would have thought breaking both sides of my ankle over 10 years ago could cause this much suffering?
But then, we do what we have to do.
So that’s where I am today, going into a new year. Other than my ankle problem, life is good. And I’m very grateful for that.
And I am in the process of setting up that book blog I wrote about, by the way. That will give me something else to focus on.
What are you looking forward to doing in 2023?
The first thing I thought of while reading this is that you have had some angels come into your life this past year – Teri, Steve, and Greg! The second thing is, stay hopeful! I know you are trying to be realistic so that you don’t get your hopes up, but I do believe in the power of positive thinking. Third, even when we think positive, that doesn’t mean we’re not entitled to a good cry.
I’m rooting for you, Brenda — cheering you on to be able to garden next spring, walk to your car and be pain free!
Such a lot of interesting comments on this post, Brenda, especially Jan’s and Gail’s. I’m so sorry about the continuing pain in your ankle. Having patience about healing is really hard, I know. Especially when your mobility is so affected. And I think you would be unusual if you didn’t cry about it. Although, I know lots of folks won’t ever let themselves cry and that’s not good for you.
I hope you will be able to figure out a way to do some gardening this Spring, even if it’s only indoors with houseplants. But, maybe doing your book blog–which I heartily endorse–will take up some of the time and effort you’re used to spend gardening. Just hang in, girl, take it one day at a time and remember to be kind to yourself, Sending hugs and love and healing energy to that ankle. Happy 2023! May it surprise us all with many GOOD THINGS!
I’ll figure out a way to dig my hands in the dirt. Surely I can manage something on the patio anyway. And maybe indoors too. I’m a homebody of the highest order, but the fact that I know I can’t go out and do things sometimes leads me to cry. Crying is good for you. Crying releases endorphins. Then I feel better.
You’ve had quite the year, Brenda. I sure hope 2023 is much kinder to you.
Aww, sweet little Gracie. She was such a beautiful little kitty. I still miss my Monkey boy so much…my heart hurts when I think about him or see his photos.
I just about cry when I see photos of him on your blog. I miss reading about him. Just seeing Gracie’s picture tore me up. I’ve had to move her photos to a central place where I don’t come across them often. Otherwise it eats me up. Not knowing why she died and why she died so young.
I hope the Gabapentin is helpful for you, Brenda. My hubby has chronic back pain even after surgery years ago and Gabapentin is very helpful for him.
Would indoor gardening be an option for you? There are so many beautiful indoor plants that you may enjoy and you could even tend to them while seated. A large rectangular planter on a stand by your patio doors would be lovely. Just a thought.
Wishing you a New Year filled with less pain and fun adventures!
I will figure it out. I always do. I’ve taken one 300 mg of Gabapentin. Makes me jittery though. Maybe that wears off.
My aunt just got a stand up walker that she can put her weight on. It has helped her a lot. Just a thought.
I have a walker. Just standing is hard though. Can’t do it more than a few minutes.
Would wrapping the ankle with an ace bandage give it a bit more support and maybe a bit less pain for walking? 2022 has been a crap year for the most part. I have been sick for most of
It with relapses of two auto- immune diseases. The medication to treat them lowered my immune function enough that I have caught Covid ( took 9wks to get through that, but never back to my starting point) and now another nasty respiratory illness that won’t go away. Off the meds, so have a double whammy with worsening pain from the autoimmune conditions. Like a never ending cycle. Frigid temperatures this past week have not helped, but still I am grateful… for not having blizzard snow, for not losing power, for heat and a wood stove to keep warm, pets for companionship and food to eat. We all have to deal with something, and in this case I consider myself lucky. Do I like being sick? Heck no, but it is out of my control at the moment. I’ll just keep plugging along at a turtles pace until I feel better. And it will get better, I have to believe that. Brenda,
I have had many days of crying and ranting and just so disappointed and frustrated. I have never liked change. I like safety and security (didn’t have much of that as a child). What I have finally learned and accepted at the ripe old age of 65, is that life is totally about change, and to let it flow around me and not panic. My life is so far from what I ever planned or imagined it would be. Disappointments and regrets? Many.
Good memories and good times, also many. Have things gone according to my timetable and wishes? Not one bit. Give your ankle more time to heal and be patient with yourself. Focusing on a new book blog and letting those creative juices flow will do you so much good. This spring may not be about gardening as it once was, but a book blog and creating it is just as interesting and doable for you at this time in your life. I am excited for you about the new blog to be born, and how life will unfold for all of us in 2023. Yeah, forget that two days ago I was pissed off at being sick again and told a friend 2023 was cancelled because I refuse to be sick into the New Year, lol! Like I said, we all have ‘those days’.
We sure do have those days. And we’re the same age. After a good cry I look around me and tell myself how lucky I am, and then I am grateful. Life is a series of hits and misses. We never know what’s around the corner. I enjoy reading about other people’s lives like yours.
2022 has been a rough year for my family, however, I am trying to depend on my faith to believe that this new year will hold many new blessings. Brenda, I will hope and pray for many new blessings for you also. You have so many people who have been blessed by your lovely writing and have learned a lot about gardening and decorating. Thank you. Carolyn in Fl.
I hope it’s warmer in Florida! Greg told me to take Gabapentin today, as he thinks that will help my pain. I didn’t think it was nerve pain, but he thinks it is. So I started that today. All we can do is look forward.
is it possible to wear a boot on each foot for better balance? !t
I don’t know. Hadn’t thought of that. I’ll ask Greg.
I’m a daily blog reader and always enjoy your book reviews. I’ll be looking forward to the book blog. Hope you have a happy new year!
I have spent THE ENTIRE AFTERNOON making a detailed graphic for the book blog. And I commissioned a woman in London, who has an Etsy shop, to create a graphic of Ivy. Going to show you tomorrow. It looks just like her!
I was just thinking about your sweet Gracie the other day, Brenda. I’m so sorry. I fell back in April and I’m still feeling pain in my shoulder, now, several months later and it makes me crazy. I can’t even begin to imagine how frustrated you much be…I wish you some relief in 2023 and some joy!
As they say, getting old is not for sissies. But we are young at heart, so we don’t always understand why our bodies aren’t complying with our requests. Hang in there. I miss Gracie SO much!
I cry when I’m stressed, or when I’m angry, or when I’m sad. Crying is a great relief valve and I believe in it 100%. I always feel better after a cry. All you can do is keep on doing what you can do, Brenda. At 71, I’m not as strong as I used to be and I worry about my balance sometimes. Some of the heart meds I’m on cause dizziness. I can no longer get new jars open sometimes and that drives me nuts! My hands now hurt sometimes for days if I “over use” them – and I never know what that “over use” may be until I’m finished and the muscles in my palms start hurting and the finger joints sound like they’re cracking and hurt to try to close. I can still type with no pain, but when I finally got around to painting that black accent wall in the living room (in November) – OUCH! Just holding and rolling the paint on or using a brush to do the edging, etc. hurt. For 2023 I’m going to continue abusing my hands by painting my bathroom (finally – that paint is only 2 years old) and I’ve got plans for doing further clean-up and reorganization of what’s in storage in the old “rec room” (and storage spaces) in the basement and also tackling a major cleaning in the “utility” areas of the basement. Everything needs a good shop vac going over. I figure if I have to hide out down there during a tornado warning in 2023, I don’t want to feel as if a giant woman-eating spider is going to attack me from behind. Also still have a lot of stuff to clean out down there. I moved here in 2014 and haven’t taken anything out of some of the boxes in the storage areas. Some major purging is called for. On the main level, I want to finally tackle the guest room, something I’ve been “planning” on doing since 2014. It needs to be painted and has been partially “taped” since 2015, with ancient paint cans still stashed underneath the bed waiting to be opened to see if there is a chance to use the paint (probably not, but I’ll look one of these days anyway). Talk about procrastination! And my den/office/library – OY! It needs a total rethink. I don’t even want to think about the outside work that needs to be done. I’ll do what I can, but it’s not as much as I used to be able to do. Being slower than I used to be, not being as strong as I used to be, it’s irritating sometimes but such is life. I enjoy doing what I am still able to do; every little job that I spread out over days/weeks/months adds up eventually and gives me a sense of accomplishment. And some months from now I’ll be able to sit outside again and read with my feet up and a glass of wine at hand in my gazebo.
Jan, you ALWAYS make me laugh. I nearly choked on the giant woman-eating spider bit! I wondered how your hands were going to hold up painting that accent wall. You sure get a lot done, whether you think so or not. You inspire me.
Brenda, count me in for reading the book blog. Every book you have reviewed sounds good to me…and I have to remind myself to finish the books I already have! haha.
I have a problem giving myself permission to sit down and read—seems I always have too much to do “first”. I think 2023 will be a change in that tune for me…reading every day!!
Would it help to wear a boot on both legs for a while? At least your body would be more balanced—might alleviate some of the back issues. I know when I used a knee scooter for about 6 months, it really “jacked up” my hip on one side and I had issues from that for about a year or so. Seems like one thing leads to another!
Happy New Year—I love your blog…Jane in Florida
I hadn’t thought about the knee scooter knocking things out of whack. But I have pain in my hips. Someone mentioned another walking boot. Will ask Greg. I run everything past him first. I have begun to read more genres of books, and make mention of various types of books in New & Notable Mentions. I know everyone likes different kinds of books, so I will be reading different ones as well. In terms of reading, my routine is to read right before bed about an hour. It calms me.
I’m looking forward to reading your book blog next year, in addition to this one. During the pandemic, I rediscovered my childhood love of reading. Mostly I check out e-books from the local library and read them on an ancient iPad. (I’m interested in your recommendations for a replacement Kindle or other e-reader, as this iPad is on its last legs.) E-books are great when you can’t get to the library or the books are too heavy to carry. I am usually reading 2-3 books at once, depending on my mood. I am always making notes on books you recommend. Also TV shows.
About the gardening and getting outside: Perhaps a motorized scooter would help you get around the place easier. You might be able to garden from a sitting position if you get those raised planter beds. I have arthritis and can’t get down on my hands and knees anymore. Still I love to get my hands in the dirt and plant flowers, so I have a few raised beds that I can “play” in from a sitting or standing position.
I’m thinking about the motorized scooter. One more thing I’d have to find room for though. I think I’ll be adding movies and TV to the book blog. It’s all entertainment. I have many book reviews on this blog that I think I’ll rewrite and then transfer to the other one. The book blog gives me another focus. Greg reminded me today: “Doc said a year to heal.” He’s right.
Keep focusing on healing and pamper yourself with whatever makes you happy on any given day. There’s nothing wrong with crying. I find that it helps me immensely. It helps me relieve some self-imposed stress. So cleansing in so many ways.
I think getting involved with your new book blog is a wonderful idea. A good way to keep your mind occupied and content.
I’m looking forward to continuing to enjoy my needle and thread. It’s amazing how peaceful I feel when while away the hours with my needle and thread.
Find your joy, Brenda!
I sure miss sewing. But I’ll focus on things I can do. Yes, part of the reason for going ahead with the book blog I’ve been thinking about for years is that I need a project/distraction I can do from my chair. I’ve been more upbeat today working on it.
As someone said it is fortunate you were able to leave that apt with the snakes and such when you did. And so thankful you had Terri to help you out. She was amazing.
It’s a new year soon and it sounds to me like you have your eyes set on a great new blog. I’ve always said I’d love to see you write a book so maybe this is a wonderful alternative. I don’t read like I used
to. My eyes do this crazy thing of blurring after reading a little then I can’t read at all. And it takes a couple of hours to settle down so I can drive. Very frustrating. I will read the new blog though as I enjoy your reviews. Hopefully this next six months will see rewarding healing with your ankle. Big hugs❤️
Teri was phenomenal. Haven’t heard from her in a while. But she stays busy with her horses. She’s in her seventies and always amazes me! Just the mere thought of taking care of horses at this stage in my life is overwhelming. That’s strange about your eyes. Thankfully I don’t have that problem. I read something virtually all day until I go to bed.
I hope you still consider adding acupuncture for pain relief. Also, there are MDs called Physiatrists that are pain specialists.
Problem is getting out to get acupuncture or anything else! I have to be able to work my way to the parking lot before I can do something like that.
First of all I am hoping that your ankle will improve (after all the doctor gave it a year to heal properly,) so that you will be able to get outside more and enjoy your patio this coming spring and summer.
I can’t wait for the summer to come around again and in the meantime I am planning what new things I want to plant including a couple of bushes for the birds to enjoy.
I love reading too so am looking forward to your new blog. I don’t really want to buy a kindle but the paperbacks are getting so expensive now I might have to think about that. I just gave my neighbor 6 paperbacks which I had read over the summer which cost me around $90 so it might well be worth it to invest in a kindle.
Other than that I am still hoping to adopt a elderly cat, my husband loves cats as much as I do but worries in case we get sick and can’t look after him/her, we are still having a discussion about that, I must admit I am being a little pushy!
Oh, adopt the kitty! And I want to see pictures. You can email them to me if you get it. The kitty deserves a loving home and I know you’ll give it that and more. Ivy is everything to me. Everyone worries about getting pets when they’re aging. But you could cross that bridge when you came to it. Get the cat.
I’d say you moved in the knick of time. Imagine being in your old apt. with the possibility of snakes and mice invading while you are not quick on your feet. I have high hopes this spring will bring you more healing. You make so many of us happy with your wonderful writing. It surely must be your season to shine coming up. We look forward to reading about your adventures!
Yes, I did move in the knick of time! Last night I picked up a little spider and put it outside. But I can’t stand the thought of snakes and mice.
Brenda, what this post tells me is that you must be a super nice, caring individual. People go out of their way to help you however they can. That’s a wonderful thing.
Being handicapped is sad, and frustrating, especially for an active, creative person like yourself. Cry yourself out, you’re more than allowed. Concentrate on your blessings. Enter 2023 with new purpose. I’m looking forward to your book blog.
Happy New Year to you!
And I’m looking forward to writing it. This blog is always and will always be my first love. Did you know this blog will be 14 years old in April!
Brenda, all things considered, you’ve had a remarkable year when looking at it in a positive manner!
A new much bigger and better home, surgical repair of the ankle, new friends in both Steve and your Physical Therapist, and Terri, your most helpful reader turned moving helper!
A book blog will be a perfect project for the new year! I too am a voracious reader who has followed many of your suggestions over the years. I will be following this new endeavor!
wishing you and Ivy a very happy and prosperous new year 2023..said as I unpack a myriad of boxes from our move over Christmas…
Oh my, a move sounds overwhelming! I’m so glad I’ve got mine over with. I wish the best for you as you make a new home.