I have my Christmas decor up, such that it is. Because I scaled back on what I wanted to do since I’m moving in January.
I truly love the lights on the Christmas tree. But I decided not to add ornaments.
I put the tabletop tree in the same place I had it last year. This has it right in my view when I’m sitting in my chair.
Christmas Tree In A Beverage Tub:
I brought the beverage tub inside to put it in. And I like to add white netting that I’ve had for years. It has the look of snow under the tree.
I put a group of small Christmas trees with a white Santa Claus on my boho table next to the tree.
A Christmas tree can still look wonderful with just the lights. It has a more natural look without adding ornaments.
And Gracie hasn’t gotten into any of the Christmas stuff. I think because the tree is in the beverage tub and the rest is on a surface she can’t seem to reach.
She did, however, run across the bottom shelf of the galvanized beverage tub. And the sound of her feet on it scared her half to death. She hasn’t gone near it again.
Well, just as I wrote about Gracie not bothering the Christmas stuff, she just got up there and knocked down one of the trees. It was that little flocked one and I don’t know what the flocking would do if she ingested it. So I put it away.
I had a big cry fest yesterday afternoon. You might think it’s silly. But I’m moving away from where I lived with Abi and Charlie, and this kind of makes me sad.
And The Tears Fell:
Of course, I’m not really leaving them because I have their boxes of ashes on display on the living room shelf. And wherever I go, they go.
Still, the tears fell and fell.
What I’m leaving is the place where we created memories together.
One of the only good things about this place is that I lived with my dog babies here. And now they’re gone.
They’re just gone.
I have Ivy and Gracie and I love them dearly. But you can’t replace beloved pets.
Everyone knows that. You can add to your family and love them all, but not one of them is replaceable.
I’ve been going through the files on this laptop and saving photos of the pets to Pinterest. Every time I see a photo of Charlie or Abi I want to sob. And oftentimes I do.
I do fine for a while, and then it hits me like a ton of bricks. He’s gone. They’re gone. Irretrievably and for all of time gone.
They were my babies and I loved them so very much that it just won’t stop hurting. My Charlie Boy and my Sweet Abi.
A Strange Time To Be Tearful:
Seems kind of weird showing Christmas decor while I’m writing about sadness. But it’s all part of life.
We have those in our life that we love beyond measure. And as with all things, we will at some point lose them.
You can’t stop it from happening; you can’t slow down the passage of time.
Love and loss, while seeming to be on opposite ends of the spectrum, are really one and the same in terms of category. If there is love, there will be a future loss.
But if you don’t dare to love, to put yourself out there, you miss so much. Even with the pain that comes after they’re gone.
To give a home to an animal and love it unconditionally; yes, yes it’s worth it.
I’m excited about moving to a new place. I’ve been here nearly 8 years and there were good times.
I have memories of the dogs running around on the patio. Being indoors doing silly things that made me laugh.
So many memories tucked away for safekeeping.
Yes, it’s time to move on. Someplace else will be home and I’ll decorate it and make it mine. Mine and Ivy’s and Gracie’s. We will move on.
But still, a bit of sadness will linger because Charlie and Abi can’t come with us.
So I’m sitting here writing to you, trying to pull myself together. I hope I’m not upsetting Ivy and Gracie. I know the dogs would have been beside themselves seeing and hearing me cry.
I’m about to feed the kitties. And that is the highlight of their day.
For some strange reason yesterday, I woke up with “Crystal Blue Persuasion” by Tommy James + The Shondells in my head.
I sang or hummed it all day until finally, I looked it up on YouTube. I hadn’t heard it in years, so I don’t know why it was stuck in my head. But I wanted to hear it again.
It was released way back in 1968! I was 11. Tommy James also composed “Crimson & Clover.”
Click here to watch and listen to them live singing “Crystal Blue Persuasion.”
Click here to listen to “Crimson & Clover.”