First Know Who You’re Dealing With:
How do you leave someone with antisocial personality disorder?
Who are you dealing with? A psychopath or a sociopath? Or are they one and the same?
The fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists both sociopathy and psychopathy under the heading of Antisocial Personality Disorders.
These disorders share many common behavioral traits which leads to some of the confusion. Key traits that sociopaths and psychopaths share include:
- A disregard for laws and social mores
- A disregard for the rights of others
- A failure to feel remorse or guilt
- A tendency to display violent or aggressive behavior
They have their own behavioral characteristics:
Sociopaths are often nervous and easily agitated. These individuals can be volatile and have emotional outbursts or go into a rage. They are dangerous because they are impulsive.
They are usually less educated than psychopaths and have more trouble holding down a job.
Sociopaths appear more disturbed or erratic. If they commit a crime, it tends to be haphazard and spontaneous.
Erratic individual versus the planner:
A psychopath plans his crime and often has a contingency plan in place. They are calm in a crisis. In other words, they are good at being criminals. Therefore they are very dangerous individuals.
Psychopaths are unable to form any emotional attachment and feel no empathy. They are aggressive and predatory. They view people as objects.
Beware Of The Charmer:
Even though they lack empathy, psychopaths are often charming individuals. They are manipulative and easily gain someone’s trust.
These people learn to mimic emotions even though they can’t feel them. So they may appear normal. It is difficult to know when a psychopathic predator has targeted you.
I’m going to empathize that: It is difficult to know when a psychopathic predator has targeted you.
How the professionals define them:
Professionals list both in the category of antisocial personality disorder as defined by the Mayo Clinic.
Definition: “A mental condition in which a person consistently shows no regard for right and wrong and ignores the rights and feelings of others. People with antisocial personality disorder tend to antagonize, manipulate or treat others harshly or with callous indifference. They show no guilt or remorse for their behavior.”
About 75 percent of sociopaths are men, while 25 percent are women.
Antisocial Personality Disorder (psychopathy or sociopathy) is often intertwined with other traits. This includes but is not limited to bullying, narcissism, gaslighting, bigotry and misogyny.
See an attorney and form a plan.
Record & Document
When you are divorcing an individual with antisocial personality disorder, they will try their best to manipulate you. Documentation of their behavior will become an important lifeline.
Don’t Let Them Control The Situation
They thrive on chaos and will run over you whenever possible. Often they will ignore court orders and delay the divorce as a means of control.
Stick To Your Plan
Once you have a safety plan in place and are proceeding with divorce, you must not waver.
A spouse with antisocial personality disorder thrives on controlling, dominating, and humiliating you.
When detaching yourself from someone with antisocial personality disorder insist on “no contact.”
Insist on written communication only. He/she will fight this because they know it is easier to confuse you via phone or in person.
Why i’m writing about this topic:
If you are wondering why I am focusing lately on this topic, it is primarily due to the emails I am getting. They are from women who are facing difficult relationships and some hope to find way a out of them.
I am trying to educate them on the behavior they might expect and the danger they could potentially be in, especially when they leave. And then to plan accordingly.