Do You Think Ivy Is Lonely?

Yesterday I called Dr. Poteet and asked if I could bring Charlie to the clinic while he was there. He goes to the clinic every day to check on and administer medication to animals, as well as feed them. So I knew he’d be there sometime.

I have seldom taken advantage of his private time. I’ve only called him on his cell phone a few times.

Charlie Has Been Sick:

I told him Charlie had been throwing up and before that a few days ago it was diarrhea. Charlie didn’t want anything to eat and just wasn’t doing well. And of course Mama is a worry wart.

He called me back later and said he’d be there at 5 p.m. if I wanted to bring Charlie in.

Dr. Poteet checked him over and ran a test and finally gave him an injection he said should settle his stomach.

While I was there, I was petting and cooing over one of the “clinic pets” named Sage. She is a smallish cat that looks much like Ivy because she has the same black on white spots.

The Clinic Cat Named Sage:

Sage has lived there most of her life, and she’s around Ivy’s age. Ivy will be three years old in May.

Dr. Poteet said she won’t let him go near her, but when I call her name she comes running to me and I pet her. Guess she doesn’t like men, because he’s a kind, kind soul.

While he was checking Charlie over, he asked me if I wanted to adopt Sage. I was surprised by his question, so I didn’t quite know what to say.

Sage Has A Disability Of Sorts:

Sage has some sort of neuropathy where she walks on her back legs on her tippy toes. I don’t know what or who caused this. He said it was something due to her back, but I’ve forgotten all the medical terminology.

I told him I’d think about it. So that brings me back to my original question: Do you think Ivy is lonely?

Ivy is a very playful cat. She likes Charlie and wants him to play with her or acknowledge her. But every time she gets too close to him he snaps at her.

I Play Fetch With Ivy:

I throw toys for her to fetch, but maybe she needs more stimulation. I’ve bought all kinds of interactive toys for her to play with. But I just wonder if she’d be happier with a companion kitty.

On the other hand, maybe she wouldn’t like another cat being around and they might fight. Sage is accustomed to being around a lot of animals, whereas Ivy isn’t.

What do you think? I respect your opinion. I’m mulling it all over. I told Dr. Poteet I’d think about it.

How Would I Manage This?

I’d have to figure out the logistics, like where to put another litter box. And a place I could feed her because Charlie can’t be able to get to the cat food. So I’d have to think all this through. And see if I could even make it work in this small home.

You know I only want what’s best for my pet babies. Charlie takes up the bulk of my time because of his illnesses, so Ivy doesn’t get as much attention as she may want.

On the other hand, have I got my hands too full with Charlie? He is sick again this morning with diarrhea. Just cleaned it off the right leg of my pants.

And Ivy is in the other room meowing. She seldom meows. Usually she meows when she wants me to get up, as if to say. “It’s morning, Ma!” But lately she’s been meowing more for some reason.

36 Comments

  1. Not now please – I have a similar situation – dog is old (15) – cat is 6 years old. Buddy. my dog, needs a lot more love and care these days and another animal in the house would really upset him. He’s a Mama’s boy so for now all is well. He and Stormy (cat) get along like brother and sister – I think another animal could actually upset Stormy more than Buddy who is pretty laid back…cat is a little devil and does things to annoy the dog all the time.

  2. Hi, Brenda.
    I’m wondering if you were giving any thought to adopting another cat before you met the kitty at the clinic. Do you need or want another pet for you? Would this kitty be more snuggly and attentive with you than Ivy has been.? If Charlie wasn’t there would you like to have a more affectionate cat? Is this kitty like that? Sometimes, seeing an animal in need pulls at our heartstrings and adopting them doesn’t seem to be the right thing to do at that point in time but that’s also when we tend to find the best match for us – the luck of the unexpected. It could be that Ivy simply wants more attention from you and that is something you can easy provide for her, that and new toys or activities. One never knows what will result from bringing in another animal until it’s done…you will never know if you don’t try. Perhaps Dr. Poteet is looking out for you, knowing that Charlie can’t stay much longer or he might just see a good match when he sees it and wanted to point that out. Whatever you decide I know you will not give up easily on making things work out for the best. You know from prior experience how active two cats can be and what is required of you in caring for them. I’ve had two cats and they were the best of friends. I have one very affectionate kitty now and she’s content on her own. I recently had one very bad experience with a young (neutered) male cat, Charlie, who seemed affectionate and so sweet but turned into a vicious biter as he matured, the deep bites were horrible and I became fearful of him. After much was done with no success to see if we could help him change that behavior, Charlie was rehomed with another strong male cat in the house and the two of them hit it off. Charlie had the much needed equal who was up for the challenges and is living happily ever after. And a year later I now have a wonderful companion kitty! It could be that Ivy will become more of a lap kitty if she sees the opportunity one day. Best of luck with working through the deciding.

  3. I know you appreciate everyone’s opinions, etc. I’ve found that you seldom make snap decisions so you’ll make the best decision for you, Charlie and Ivy.

  4. I’ve always found two cats to be a lot of fun together. When adopting a second cat, keep that cat separated in a room with a baby gate in the doorway. Allow the original cat to have the run of the rest of the house. They will notice each other and smell each other pretty quickly. Keep them separated, allowing them to observe each other on either side of the baby gate. Eventually they will come close to each other without hissing. Once they start sitting on either side of the gate, curious about the other, remove the gate but monitor them carefully for several hours. Separate if fighting occurs and go back to isolating the new cat and give them more time. If they will get along and accept each other, you should know in a weekend. Separating this way keeps the established heirachy (Ivy’s boss, she was first). That’s the best method I’ve found for the cats, I agree it might be taxing for Charlie, though. Good luck, whatever you decide 💕

  5. Abie was such an adorable character.
    for years it seemed that little Charlie just kind of played second fiddle and let her take center stage with you.
    now he has Mom all to himself and it’s like he gradually just came into his own.
    remember when you couldn’t even take his picture? he would always look away.
    now he cuddles by you. he feels very LOVED. and in his worse days he needs you.
    your heart is kind and one day maybe you could work it out with Sage.
    but on little Charlie’s behalf I would vote… not now. xo

  6. I pretty much agree with what most everyone has said, that that would be a lot for you to take on right now. And I also agree that it would be overwhelming for Charlie. However, someday when Charlie is not there, Ivy will definitely be lonely. She has the markings that show she might be partly a Turkish Van breed which are very social and like other cats most of the time. They also like to play a lot as you’ve have found out.

    I think that when that day happens, when you are ready, that would be the time to bring in another cat because she would be ready for a new playmate and be more amenable. And yes there are definitely steps to take and you can find them all over the internet. I have done it and had success and my cats are now good buddies but when we introduced another female, the two new girls didn’t get along. It’s very dependent upon the two cats and your emotional energy at the time. Keep in mind too that the kitty from the vet might not be able to keep up with Ivy and I wonder if Ivy might accidentally hurt her in her rambunctiousness.

    And FYI, your pop up ad keeps blocking my screen as I try to type this comment. I know you usually talk to your provider when that happens to get them to stop.

  7. This is just my opinion, not trying to tell you what you should do.
    I would be worried that a new kitty in the house may make Charlie feel over whelmed, and you never know how Charlie and the new kitty may or may not get along. And if they don’t get along, Charlie may be frightened of it and made nervous and stressed. I think Charlie needs the coddling that you give him now to keep him going.

  8. Clearly the Dr knows the situation and still brought up the idea. I don’t think he’d have done so if he thought it could be a bad thing. How about a playdate or 3?

    1. Problem is, cats don’t do “play dates” like dogs do. It takes a long time and lots of training for cats to get used to each other.

  9. Ivy may or may not accept/appreciate another cat but if you go that route I suggest you have a trial period/return policy agreement with whomever you adopt the cat from so if it turns out Ivy prefers to be an only child it can be easily returned. Like others have said there are several reasons why this may not the best time to be considering adding to your household. IMO you and Charlie don’t need any added /unnecessary stress right now. Perhaps this would be a decision better made when Ivy is your only resident fur baby?

  10. I think I would wait because of Charlie needing so much attention right now. When I did, I would bring her home on a trial basis, just to be sure Ivy likes her! Speaking from experience

  11. I think Dr. Poteet is a very kind and emotionally intelligent vet. In my mind, his offer of Sage is him trying to “soften the blow” of what’s to come. It is not my intention to be unkind, but it is what it is. You are a very strong and resilient lady, Brenda.
    You will know what is best. 💕
    Lots of hugs and pets to Charlie and Ivy.

  12. I don’t think it would be a good idea to get Sage at this time especially with Charlie’s ailing health. You have your hands full as it is with taking Charlie to his appointments , and you have to consider whether you feel up to taking on the responsibility of a cat with health problems! If you do decide to take Sage, I would do a trial weekend!

  13. Hi Brenda. I think everyone is putting in their thoughts on your questions but it will come down to what you really want. I have always had dogs and do not know much about cats but my friends that have cats say introducing them takes some time. Sometimes a few weeks. You have steps to follow to introduce them and it takes time and patience. That would be a lot for you with all you have going with Charlie. Plus with Charlie older and having so many health issues would bringing that acclimation time in his life right now be good for his health. Lots for you to think about. I feel for you because here is this sweet kitty that would do well in your home and your Vet knows you give great of care to your pets and am sure that is why he asked you to adopt her. On the other side of this I know he would understand you not wanting to take on Sage right now with all you have going on with Charlie. Such a hard spot you are in. Good luck with whatever you decide. I know whatever you decide you will take everyone into consideration.

  14. I’m going to be practical here. A new pet may be good for Ivy but probably something Charlie could do without. Also right now with Charlie & his needs, I’m guessing can get quite expensive so adding another pet to the mix will be more so. Someday when Charlie’s time has come, maybe then think of adding another pet. I would be very hesitant now. He needs you now for extra time & attention.

  15. I don’t think you give cats enough time to see if they’ll be good companions in a weekend. Cats are on their own time table. I do think Ivy would benefit from a feline friend. She seems to crave attention. I think it would be best to get a cat close to her age. Sage sounds pretty perfect to me in that she’s used to other pets. I’m wondering if the vet might throw in her vet care at a reduced rate or for free. You do have lots of expenditures for dear Charlie. Cats are do not seem as expensive often as dogs at least in my experience. I think if you consider adopting Sage it should be on a trails basis but not too short a time. I introduced a dear mellow cat to my two former ferals and he’s delighted. They are not so much but they aren’t fighting either. He, however, is seemingly so grateful from being rescued from a Walmart parking lot that he just puts all the time. Moosie( he’s a big boy now… 18 lbs of cat) loves his creature comforts and I love taking care of him and his adopted siblings too. Gives me purpose and someone to talk to daily. I do think they understand so much more than we give them credit for but then again we are mere humans with our own built in draw backs. Take care, Brenda. Love you❤️

    1. I totally agree that you can’t tell if cats will get along in a weekend. I’ve had cats all my life and I know personally from trying to introduce another cat into the household, plus from my friends who have done this, that it takes at least a month for them to even get used to each other. I even had to return a cat to back to my friend after a month because he terrorized my other two cats.

      Also, a cat’s care isn’t necessarily cheaper than a dog’s. My cat that died a couple of years ago was our “million dollar kitty”. One time he had to have surgery for a urinary blockage. Then as he got older, he had glaucoma and other eye problems and also had thyroid disease. His vet care cost a LOT of money! My female cat is now heading the same way as another “million dollar kitty” as we call them. She has skin issues that have required a vet dermatologist and various medications, as well as kidney disease.

  16. I agree with others that suggest having Sage meet Ivy, and spend a weekend together. I do think Ivy would enjoy the company, and I believe the two would become friends, Neither Cat is old, so Ivy would still be “Queen” of the house, and I think she would accept Sage. I am sure Sage would love to be in a loving home such as yours. Charlie probably won’t care, one way or the other, if they leave him alone.

  17. With Charlie not feeling well maybe now is not the time. You’ve had cats before and you know there’s about a two week adjustment period. I remember that cat you got in Texas that wouldn’t come out at all. They can all just be so strange. Yesterday out Norah that is also Ivy’s age scratched the nose of our 80 lb pitbull. She is such a terror. You will know when it’s time.

  18. My opinion only…when 2 strange cats live in the same house they tend to start marking their territory. Female cats spray too. You have so much love in your heart for the 2 babies u already have. Charlie is an old man and needs much of your attention. Please think long and hard about this. Don’t project what you think it will b like. Think in the here and now. 😘

  19. Brenda,
    I wonder as well if bringing in another animal is the best for Charlie right now. Your kind heart wants to solve all the problems, but sometimes ‘do nothing’ is the answer.
    Care for Charlie, extra pets for Ivy, and loving kindness for yourself.
    You have your hands full right now.
    Dr. Poteet is wonderful, and he is showing great respect for you, but it sounds as if Sage will still be there when you’re in a better position to make a decision.
    But you know we will always be supportive of whatever you decide.
    🙏🙏🙏 for all.

  20. Several thoughts: Cats are mostly solitary creatures. They do not need another cat to play with or be with to be content. So now, Ivy is not lonely. Cats are also very territorial. If you introduce another cat into your house, it’s going to take a lot of work and time to get the two cats acclimated. Do you have the time and patience for that, especially with Charlie being sick? The two cats would have to be separated at first and slowly introduced by putting their food bowls on opposite sides of the closed door wherever the new cat is (your bedroom, I’m assuming), then putting new cat in a carrier and letting them sniff each other, etc. There will be a lot of hissing and fighting. Not to mention, if Sage already has neurological problems, you might be looking at big vet bills down the road.

    I also think Charlie might be very upset by a new creature in the house. Probably best to keep his life as stable and calm as you can right now.

  21. I think a trial run of a weekend would help you figure out whether or not it’s a good fit. I don’t think you’d need another litter box they probably would share. And from what I remember the food would probably not be an issue unless one of the cats is food protective. Most animals share.

  22. I brought in a young (foundling) cat that bonded immediately with my other cat; I’ve also had cats that still spit and hiss when they see each other after a year of living in the same house. These were all females, so as far as I can see it’s all about the individual. Give Sage a couple of weeks as a trial and you’ll know for sure if she’s a good fit.

  23. If it were me I would not bring in another cat as I don’t think cats like other cats. I always try and look at things from my cats point of view (when I had one) whatever I thought was best for him I would or wouldn’t do. Certainly I would not bring in another animal, cat or dog for Charlie’s sake.

  24. My first thought regarding the question of adopting Sage is of Charlie. He is in such frail health that at this time in his life it would unduly add major stress to him. I say this because I brought in another cat (well actually 3 ended up here in the end) and it has been upsetting for my elderly (20 yr old) cat. Molly has always been a very small kitty and due to her advanced age has lost weight and is frail. The other cats sense she is weaker & frail and pick on her. For that reason, I regret adding more furkids in when I did.
    I love all my babies and none of them are going anywhere, but it has increased my stress level as well keeping them separated and Molly safe. All the other cats get along well now after an adjustment period. I do think Ivy would like a feline companion to play with. I have found that bringing in a younger kitty (not more than a year old), the older cat would feel less threatened that her space and place in the home is being invaded. Ivy needs her “Princess” status since she has been the only cat so far. A younger cat will keep her active and playful.
    I hope poor Charlie feels better. He struggles so. It hurts when our babies get old and decline in health.

    I

  25. If the cats are young they play and get along. But cats are happy by themselves as they get older. They do not need another as dogs do. I wouldn’t adopt this other cat

  26. Waiting seems the best idea to me. Two ailing pets sounds overwhelming unless you do not mind the cost of your time and vet bills. There will always be another pet to care for.

  27. I agree with Jan, Ivy knows Charlie is sick and it upsets her. I think you would need a trial session with Ivy and Sage to see if they would get along. No need making arrangements for Sage if her and Ivy can’t be friends. Anxious for updates.

  28. I’m going to suggest you think long and hard about this before you make any decision. I had 1 dog and 1 cat . They get along great . I thought another dog would be good for them . They are all about the same size 10 pounds . They tolerate the newer dog , but he doesn’t want to play with them . Once and a while the cat will cuddle with him . They are all around the same age . I hope this helps in some way .

  29. My little one, Kitty has been meowing constantly, the last couple of days. She usually wants to go outside and play in my little garden, that I sporadically let her and my older one enjoy; she is also a lovebug so she probably wants attention too.
    It took Kitty and my older one, Baby, some time to get along. It’s been 2 years, and even now, they get into a standoff. Baby puts up with Kitty’s annoying nature, but they also groom each other. Two females, is something to consider.
    I also had an older ailing dog, Liberty, she has now passed. There were no cats in the house before her.

  30. Ivy knows Charlie is sick, and pets find this distressing when their house mates and people don’t feel good, get sick, are injured or are emotionally upset or depressed.

  31. Hello!
    Could you possibly have Sage for a few weeks to see how they would get along? I think Ivy would benefit from a friend. 😊

  32. Most kitties like to have a playmate to play with. My two chase each other and wrestle. Introduce a new kitty slowly.

  33. I would also suggest doing a sleepover test run to see how it goes. I do think Ivy needs a friend and more stimulation.

  34. Ask if you can take Sage home for a weekend visit and see how it goes. I have always had two of a kind (2 cats 2 chihuahuas) they seem to comfort each other. Good luck. Although I am sure whatever you decide you will work out to the best for everyone. 💝

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