I stopped listening to music June 28, 2021.
It was the day my Charlie took his last doggy breath.
I didn’t make a conscious decision really.
But I knew that it was going to be hard enough to adjust to sitting in my chair without him being by my side, his body warming mine.
I’d have to get through that part first. So one step at a time.
Why Music Makes Us Feel Emotional:
A neuroscientist explained that music is the language of emotion. He went on to say:
Much of the emotional significance that we find in music comes from our own life experiences. While still in the cradle we learn to associate the music we hear with the emotional environment we hear it in. So a mother’s lullaby might imprint us with calm memories for major keys, while a lovers’ lament in A minor would remind us of breakups and ex-girlfriends.
The loss of Charlie was like a stone I had to swallow every single day.
You can’t lasso love and put it in a box. It follows in your footsteps wherever you go.
Some people don’t see pets the way I do. To me, they are beloved family members. I would rather be around my pets than be around most people.
Pets love you unconditionally. How many humans can you say that about?
Why Losing A Dog Can Be Harder Than Losing A Relative Or Friend:
Cornelia H. Dudley, Professor of Psychology at Knox College, wrote the following about his and his wife’s experience with losing a dear pet:
“When people who have never had a dog see their dog-owning friends mourn the loss of a pet, they probably think it’s all a bit of an overreaction; after all, it’s “just a dog. However, those who have loved a dog know the truth: Your own pet is never “just a dog.”
He said that many times, he’s had friends guiltily confide to him that they grieved more over the loss of a dog than over the loss of friends or relatives.
Research has confirmed that for most people, the loss of a dog is, in almost every way, comparable to the loss of a human loved one.
Certain pieces of music can remind us of past events, experiences, and people. And this triggers memories and associated emotions.
Thus the pain of loss seems to be intensified when listening to music that already brings up emotions.
I took the remote to my Crosley CD player out of the drawer where it had been for the past six months.
I had no idea what CD was in the slot, but it really didn’t matter. For the most part, I listen to instrumental piano music.
I let the melody flow through me and absorbed the accompanying emotions.
Once I listened to one CD, I got up to pick out another one. I realized that I’d missed this.
My grief still walks with me. I savor my memories and my photos of Abi and Charlie, for they are precious.
I just keep telling myself: One step at a time.