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  1. Everybody grieves whether it’s a person or a pet that passes! There’s nothing wrong with you bc you don’t mope around all the time! You take care of Charlie and yourself, watch over your plants, go places, decorate, craft, read alot and your very involved with your daughter and grandson’s life. This is your blog Brenda and you can say whatever is on your mind! Oh, I forgot photography too- taking all those beautiful pictures and gardening! Did I miss anything? ?

  2. Oh, about butterflies — about two months ago, we were in a national forest area of our state and we saw several beautiful blue butterflies in a wet sandy area, getting a drink. They looked perfect. Then, two weeks ago, we were back in the same place, and saw only one such butterfly. Its wings were ragged and actually, one wing was reduced to only about three-fourths of its original size. But it still was flitting about. It certainly was a symbol for not giving up when things get rough!

  3. Hi Brenda. We’ve had more butterflies this year, surely because there are more flowers. When we moved here two years ago there were no flowers at all and just one tree. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, but I still do feel a bit of amazement when butterflies land on the buddleia, or butterfly bush, that a friend gave me last year. I planted it where I can see it out the kitchen window, and it has been a pleasant sight. I’m glad you can look out at your patio and see lovely flowers and insects.

  4. I agree that we are all unique in how we handle grief. I have lost many pets (as a child and as an adult), and have also lost my father, my grandparents, aunts and uncles, my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law, friends, and worst of all, my firstborn son. There is no right or wrong way to handle or express grief, and there is no timetable. Writing about it, as you do, is great therapy. If you were curled up in a ball or turning to alcohol or drugs to dull your pain, or not seeing your daughter and grandson, then yes, that would be worrisome, but it sounds like you are handling your grief and stress in a healthy way.

  5. The butterfly is beautiful. I just hate the fact that many of them are endangered, especially the Monarch. I want to plant more of the plants that are beneficial to them in my yard. It’s beyond me how people who own companies that produce the toxins that are killing them can sleep at night. It’s all about money to them. So sad.

    Glad you were able to get out for lunch with your daughter. I enjoy doing that with my daughters, too, although we don’t often get the chance these days with them being busy mothers and my oldest daughter living an hour away. But I always ask for lunch with them for my birthday.

    Hope you and Charlie have a good weekend together. I would love to meet little Charlie with his tongue out. He’s such a cutie. I think we would get along.

    Take care, Brenda.

  6. Grief takes as long as it takes…only you will know when it begins to wane. I’d see shadows on the floor, or clothes and my heart would lurch, because I’d think it was my Springer. It took forever – even in a home he’d never lived in – before the pain turned to sweet memories. Surely no one thinks you’re going to wake one day and decide to stop mourning her. It happens when it happens.
    You and Charlie might enjoy the Warrior Canine Connection on Explore.og. It’s a great organization that has a 24/7 puppy cam – only right now there are 3! I don’t do links so Google it if you need some therapy. I’ve finally stopped the hourly addiction – sort of. (The pups are only Goldens and Labs, but boy are they cute.)

  7. I think you have a big, caring community of readers who want the best for you and Charlie. As part of that community, I know that I miss hearing about Abi’s antics. In our way, we grieve with you for her. Thank you for your candor in sharing your thoughts and feelings with us.

  8. I too understand your grief; I think you should continue to write about and express it. I just lost one of my cats 10 days ago; my grief comes out of nowhere sometimes it seems…

  9. I am glad you had some time out with your daughter today. It gives your mind a new place to rest for a while when you people watch or just take in the beauty of the day. I went to a thrift store and shopped around this afternoon and I feel better browsing and finding a few new patterns for me to sew or some new fabric to play with. I feel your emotions so much about grieving and realize through your writings that I AM normal and will always feel sympathy for those that can’t take care of themselves. And I am grateful I am like that !!

  10. The grief comes and goes. Some days and minutes are better than others. The picture of the butterfly is beautiful. Have a beautiful weekend with Charlie. Colleen and Baron

    1. Yes, some days are better than others. Have a nice weekend, Colleen and Baron.

  11. I know how you feel. It is very hard loosing a pet. I just lost my 18 year old cat

  12. I just love those picture of Charlie with that tongue hanging out, he is so adorable!
    Enjoy your weekend Brenda and Charlie!
    Carol and Molly

    1. When strangers see him in my car with that tongue hanging out, I wonder what they think.

  13. It will be 4 months since I said goodbye to my Dad on Oct 4th. Some days I’m ok, I know he’s not suffering any longer. Sometimes the grief hits me like a ton of bricks, and flattens me.

    I know I will need to say goodbye to my old girl, Lily, soon – she’s losing control of her bodily functions and having a really tough time getting up and down the stairs. I knew it was inevitable, that’s when I started searching for a new sweet angel to welcome into our home, to keep Monkey company after Lily is gone. It doesn’t make the thought of it any easier, but I do want to scatter her ashes in my dad’s garden, as he was extremely fond of her and always, right up until the end, talked about how she was the BEST dog. They will be together when she goes, and I’ll visit them both there daily.

    Have a great lunch with your daughter, and a wonderful weekend with your sweet little Charlie.

    1. I admire how you are handling this. Thinking ahead. But feeling your pain when it hits. What else can one do?

  14. Dear Bren,
    It is alright if you still grieve. Myself and my daughter are still grieving for our babies and it has been several years. It gets better in time but you never forget.
    So cry as long as you need to.
    Brenda I just love little Charlie. He will be ok, I will pray for him as I do for mine.
    Love You and Little Charlie,

  15. Good morning Brenda,

    I hope that you have a wonderful lunch with your daughter. Grief is an unpredictable thing, it sneaks up on us sometimes and settles in for a bit. Other times just a fleeting moment, a few tears and then a smile of happier times. Please continue to share whatever you would like we are all here for you and if you.

    I hope you and Charlie have a wonderful weekend.

    1. We had a good hour to catch up at lunch. She had to go back to work, but I really appreciate our lunches.

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