Readers are curious:
Of course many bloggers don’t write about their personal lives. And that is their prerogative.
If they want to blog about pretty things and tell readers where they bought them or how they made them, there’s nothing wrong with that. And many readers want that and nothing else, so they are happy campers.
But to some readers it seems unbalanced. They wonder why their own lives don’t measure up. They feel they aren’t getting the whole picture of this person whose blog they love to read daily.
Does a blogger owe readers transparency?
Does a blogger owe their readers more transparency? Of course not. There are no rules.
Many bloggers are married and were either very lucky or a whole lot smarter than I was. Perhaps they made wiser choices; had better insight.
Somehow they did indeed find their prince. And have lived happily ever after. For real.
But that didn’t happen in my case.
Why i got on this topic:
I got on this topic because there is a popular blogger, a published author, who has seemingly deleted her longtime blog, Mabel’s House.
People she knew and trusted in her town, who she should have been able to count on, were not kind to her.
The pain of it all:
I want to write her and tell her that there are more of us out here, and she is not alone. But I have no way to reach her.
Her words are uniquely and poignantly beautiful. But there is a sadness that runs through the paragraphs like a cut that won’t stop bleeding.
“…So lately, you guys, lately it’s been a bit crazy. I’ve been amazed at how deep the post-divorce scrutiny has been. I mean, I like to think I’m interesting and all… but not this interesting. The gossip. The texts to my close friends asking questions about me (not directly to me, never directly), has been ridiculous. The online stalking. I mean, COME ON.
I keep hearing my late Uncle Trent’s words in my head.
“Some people don’t have anything better to do than sit around and pick lint out of their belly buttons.”
And it makes me cranky. Because I love blogging. And I love being a writer. I love my Facebook account, and Instagram is fun. But I do not like feeling like I’m a side show. I don’t like feeling like my real life, in all it’s painful glory lately, is some sort of reality sitcom to be watched and critiqued.
Actually, it kind of makes me want to set my hair on fire and beat it out with a golf shoe…”
The girl is FUNNY!
Things just didn’t work out in her marriage.
Bloggers & divorce:
Bloggers of this genre do get divorced. At least some of us do. I have seen some over the years I’ve been blogging.
They write that they are working on their marriage. You can feel their hope in between the lines.
And then they fade away for a time. They post erratically, months pass, and suddenly they begin to talk about their pain.
Or they disappear completely because their lives are not perfect after all.
I very much admire women who are open about what’s going on, because it proves that all of us live through things we never could have predicted. And survive.