The Passing of Their Dad

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Last night, my daughters lost their father. He passed away after they went home for the night.

I have felt like I’ve been perched on the edge of my seat for a week, knowing this was coming. Knowing how hard it was going to be for them to watch their father die.

Kendra called me this morning and told me.

She said this was a wake-up call for her to slow down. To not work so much and begin to enjoy life more.

I’ve been telling her this for some years. But she’s got a son in his second year of college and a 15-year-old daughter. So there are expenses she shares with her ex-husband.

Their dad liked Elvis, so she said they played spiritual songs sung by Elvis.

They talked to him and told him it was okay for him to go. She said she told him that she’d take care of Kasi, who is 4 years younger. So, for him not to worry about that.

Kasi had gone home. And Kendra left about 10 p.m. last night. She said this time she didn’t tell him she’d see him tomorrow as she usually did. And indeed she wouldn’t

Losing a Parent:

Hospice had told them the loved one sometimes waits till the family has gone home before they die. So that was their reason for leaving at night. To let him know they had gone home and were okay.

Before she left, she said she kissed his forehead and then drove home. He died an hour later, and they got the inevitable call no one wants to answer.

I’ve never buried a parent, so I’ve never been in their shoes. I could only imagine their sadness and grief.

Kendra said she wants to go hiking more. This is something she’s recently begun doing. She told me how she’d come to enjoy sitting in her backyard with a cup of coffee and listening to the birds sing.

They never thought they’d be like mom and get into all “the nature stuff.” But it happens, I guess, as you realize what’s truly important in life.

It’s the simple things. The natural passing of the seasons and how life seems rejuvenated when spring comes at the end of winter. When green sprouts from the ground and leaves bud on the tree branches.

You find yourself crying because he was your children’s father.

I hadn’t seen him in decades. But you cry because you shared children. And because this man was a part of your life for a time.

Andrew & Riley:

Nine-year-old Andrew and 20-year-old Riley will be among the pallbearers. As well as Kasi’s husband, Ross, and Kendra’s boyfriend, Scott.

The arrangements will be made, and then there’s the funeral. Kasi’s husband has taken on much of that, and I’m so thankful to him. Because they’re both physically and mentally exhausted.

I’m so proud of them for being there to help their father make this transition. They’ve been his rock for over a year when he needed them the most.

The need arose, and they truly stepped right up and took charge when their dad got sick. Then came the long months of cancer treatment, and the inevitable outcome when nothing more could be done.

Ivy knows something is up. She’s staying close to me.