What The Acupuncture Vet Said
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I keep thinking about what the acupuncture vet said to me.
The patio looks sad. The zinnias are dead, as are many other plants. But the petunias and eucalyptus are still showing a bit of life. And of course the herbs. Herbs are pretty hardy. The sunshine coming in is bright, but it’s cold outside.
Hyacinth Bean Vine:
The hyacinth bean vine seeds I planted didn’t even form bean pods. I was hoping I’d get some beans so I’d have them to save and plant next spring. But an early winter surprised us all.
I guess I need to go out and do a bit of maintenance, cut off the dead parts of the withering plants. But I just don’t have it in me right now.
I’m doing a load of laundry. Listening to the machine go through its cycles. Thinking, but trying not to think.
Ivy On Her Best Behavior:
Ivy has been on her best behavior this weekend. She quietly plays with her toys and occasionally comes to lie on the table next to my chair, so I will pet her.
Friday, Charlie wasn’t supposed to go to an acupuncture appointment, but I called the vet, and she said to bring him in and leave him for a bit.
They said that they’d call me when they had him feeling better, and I could come to pick him up. I took that opportunity to run some errands, as I don’t like to leave Charlie any more than I have to.
Anticipatory Grief:
When I went back to pick him up, I told her that I was having a hard time doing his land therapy at home because my back was giving me problems.
It’s hard for me to get back up once I get down on the floor.
She told me the team had met and decided I should just enjoy Charlie now. And for me not to worry too much about all the other therapy at home.
She said, “This is bonus time.”
I asked her what that meant. It means I’ll be coping with anticipatory grief.
Bonus Time with Charlie:
She said she never thought Charlie would make it this long and that he had been doing well with the acupuncture. And that I should spend this time just loving and enjoying being with him.
Those words pierced my heart. I try not to get upset in front of Charlie, so I put on a brave face. But inside, I was falling apart.
It is inevitable, I know.
I hear him cough and choke, and there’s not much I can do beyond giving him the hydrocodone syrup. And be there with him. Give him his meds, feed him, and tend to him. I hate that he hurts, and I can’t do anything more for him.
I’ll love him and savor the time we have left. However long that may be.
Brenda ~ my heart and thoughts are with you. Hard words to hear; probably hard for the vet to say, too. To paraphrase a song from “Camelot” ~ simply love him, love him, love him.
Hugs ~
Brenda, you and Charlie share one of those very special bonds. I know he and Abby got you through your move to OK and were/are your constant companions. Charlie feels all of your love. He trusts you to do what’s best for him. I believe Ivy knows what’s happening and that’s why she doesn’t antagonize him. If he enjoys his hard boiled egg each day, would you consider giving him a second one at his other meal time? He might like cottage cheese as well.
Thoughts and prayers to all of you.
My heart breaks for you Brenda! Charlie, Ivy and you will be in my prayers! Tears are streaming down my face as I’m getting ready to send this message to you! Take care of yourself and keep Charlie closer!
All three of ours cats who have passed have come back to visit us. Cats and dogs are God’s creatures and have special talents in life and afterwards. When Charlie goes, and I hope it is not soon, he will still be there. He will still come to see you and love you.
I am so very sorry I will pray for you and sweet Charlie !
I went thru this in Feb.with my precious MALLORY !
It is so very hard and especially you and I with our other health problems with our backs,make it even worse .
It makes it double hard .
Make each day count .
I think IVY realizes that something is going on with Charlie.
That may be why she is quiet.
You must get lots of rest and be strong .
Again I am so sorry .I have not replaced Mallory I don’t feel at my age I can take care of another sweet baby .We only have the Cat .
I am sure you also are feeling a loss knowing your friend NATHAN is leaving also .Be kind to yourself !
Winters are hard also and holidays when we are so confined .Especially with cold and snow Winters .I am dreading that .
God bless you in your sorrow I think of you every day .
Hugs to you and Charlie !
You have given Charlie a wonderful loving home. He’s been a great companion.
Well, Brenda, I hope it will comfort you that you did what few folks or vets ever do a dog!! That won’t change what comes…but maybe it will bring peace knowing you did all humanly possible!! I do believe dogs are in the next life…the ones we had here…keep focused on that too!! Sending hugs…I know it is very hard!! Take care of yourself too!!
My thoughts and prayers are with you and Charlie at this difficult time !
how in the world could anyone not love that tiny face! and I agree with Kris and Impy and so many others. it’s your own LOVE that keeps him going!
bless you Brenda. and bless your beloved tiny Charlie Ross. XO
So sorry to hear the sad diagnosis about your precious Charlie. May you and he keep on enjoying each day. He and you will always be in a loving relationship. Carpe Diem.
Oh Brenda, i am sorry to hear of this. I know what he means to you. It hurts so much knowing we can only have them for such a short time in our life. He has been your rock for years now. I am happy that you brought Ivy into the mix and she fills her days with many shenanigans. Just keep that sweet boy close.
I so feel everything Impy has posted. I knew sooner or later, as you know also, that the sad words would come. I do know that Charlie is one of the lucky dogs, I know not another person could love him as much as you do. I have tears in my eyes as I write this, and pray you have more days to love each other. You both are in my prayers.
Awww Brenda I am so sorry. Just remember this story from me about Cooper. He was our rescue basset hound that was the best dog ever. Then he got that aggressive cancer and only had maybe a month or two. Then our Vet tried the experimental medication that was showing promise to now cure the cancer but give them more time. They only predicted at the most 6months with the medication. Cooper leaved another year and no other dogs in the study lived past three months on the drug. The Vet said it was because we rescued him and loved him like no other person ever did and his will to live and how happy and loved he was gave him that extra time. So remember this with Charlie. He loves you so much and does not want to leave as much as you do not want him to go. So the love and attention you give him will give him those extra endorphins that love produce to help him to continue on. Sorry the Vet was so blunt but I guess it is better they be honest then not tell you. Just keep loving him.
Kris
I am very sorry to hear this. I l ou st my 16 year old Miniature Schnauzer 2 weeks ago, and am heartbroken. I just enjoyed my last few months, weeks, and loved her.
I will pray for you, as others pray for me. Kathy
Sometimes love hurts. You’ve given and been given unselfish love. May your & Charlie’s pain be eased and that you are both granted gentle rest and peace. Barb
PRAYERS FOR YOU AND PRECIOUS CHARLIE. CHERISH YOUR TIME TOGETHER !
Brenda, I care.
The struggle is real and so is God
May you and Charlie be in the moment with comfort & peace.❤️
Also, Little Ivy as she understands this difficult time.
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I am sorry…having pets is so difficult because they do not live as long as we do. I think it hurts more when they leave us. Hug him…love him..take a zillion pictures..and just enjoy him! Appreciate each moment.
Last January I took my beloved cocker spaniel to be put to sleep. On my own. He’s loved by my husband and kids as much but I felt the need to spare them. He had congestive heart failure and we got bonus months totaling 5 months. I know personally about the coughing and the many trips outside. He was such a good boy. Then the days he was quieter and I wanted to keep going. At some point I realized I was dragging it out for me, and he was paying the price. I am still heart broken but as you know with your girl, the days at some point are more survivable. I wear a curl of his hair in a locket around my neck to this day. I kiss the locket daily. Brenda I know how it feels and I am so sorry. You will know when the balance tips to it being harder for him to stay with you than it should be. Your pups are so darn lucky to have had the mom they do. And I know it’s too soon but I hope another lucky pup finds it’s way to you and Ivy someday. I can only imagine Ivy. Charlie has taught her to belong to a “pack”. She will look for that. A companion while you’re out. A rescue pup found its way to me. A senior chocolate lab with a gray muzzle weighing 113lbs. His dad had to go into a home and it was me or the pound. I think my cocker arranged it from above. What a sweet soul I have to click clack across the floors now. I know I will lose him much sooner than I would have a puppy. I didn’t think I’d ever choose to love and lose again. He changed my mind. As long as I live, I will give the love I have to the pups that come into my life. I hope you can too. The ones we lose, send us the ones that need us. I love your little family and all you share with us. I look forward to it daily and it changes my life for the better. You are an amazing lady. I’m blessed to know you even from afar. Hugs, Impy
Everyone has stated my thoughts so beautifully and I so understand where you are. Just talk to him and continue to give him all the love in the world. You’ve provided a wonderful, loving home all these years and he knows that. Sending you strength, peace and love.
Brenda your pets are lucky to have such a loving Mother. My thoughts are with you.
Know that was heartbreaking to hear those words even though you sort of already knew. I hope he has much more time with you and he has been so blessed to have such a loving way of life and I know you never give up making him comfortable. He is adorable. Peace and love to you both.
I know your heart is aching and mine is aching for you also. I talked to my Romeo a lot the last days of his life and told him what a wonderful dog he was and how much I loved him. I believe in a hereafter so I told him I would be joining him soon and that I would always love him. So give that precious boy lots of love and attention and savor the moments you still have together.
I’m so sorry my friend, I know exactly how you feel. Poor sweet Charlie, just cuddle him and love him and cherish this time with him. My heart breaks for you having to think about this again. Xo
Your love for Charlie is a blessing for him; he is being cared for by the person who loves him the most in this world. You are doing all you can, and more.
Try to keep your spirits up and try not to be down through this time. I know, and understand.
Try to take care of yourself, as well.
Sending Love and prayers your way.
I know this is hard for you and I am full of compassion for you and Charlie. You and he have given so much love to each other over the years. I pray for peaceful, pain-free time for both of you.
Heartbreaking, but inevitable news as our little loved ones grow older. Enjoy the sweet boy and gather memories. I’m crying as I type this. My little Dixie, my 13 year old yorkie, has heart problems and is blind and the future looks similar. Best wishes to you.
Those are tough words to hear. I’ve been there and I know how badly it hurts. Console yourself that Charlie has had an amazing life…and will continue to do so. Enjoy him. Spoil him. And be kind to yourself.
Sending prayers and love your way… Charlie and you are so lucky to have each other… Give him all the love you have and cherish these days…
Oh, Brenda, my heart goes out to you. You and Charlie are in my prayers.
Is Charlie the dog?
Yes.
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this again. Take their advice and enjoy your time with him.